First time buyers relocating to another state

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My partner and I currently live in California and are interested in purchasing a 2-4 unit multi-family in Coos Bay, OR. We would prefer to use conventional financing but after talking to a loan officer at my bank, Wells Fargo, and doing other research, we see that we may need to find some more creative financing.

Our situation is that we feel we have adequate funds (at least 20%) for the down payment, 6 months of reserves, closing costs, and rehab funds, and good credit scores, but we may run into trouble with our monthly income. I currently run my own housekeeping business and my boyfriend has worked at a local grocery store for the past 15 years. Wells Fargo told me that if we move out of state my income won't count at all because I am self-employed, and my boyfriend would have to have a job offer in the same field he is in currently. He feels like he would like to have the ability to look for the best paying job he can get and not be forced into possibly having to take an entry level position just to stay in the same field. Obviously my income not counting at all will have a big impact on our debt-to-income ratio also. We are currently completely debt free and have been told we would be in great shape for the amount we want to borrow if we wanted to stay here. The problem is that things here cost more than we would like to spend. 

So my question, is there a way to get around the debt-to-income criteria by having ample reserves? We would really love to be able to get an FHA or traditional mortgage since we do intend to occupy the property. We are looking into investment loans and right now that looks like our best bet, but we would like to put down less than 20% if possible so we can keep our cash reserves. Any suggestions? If we purchased the property with an investment loan and then quit our jobs, made the move and found new jobs in Oregon, would the bank know and call the loan?

Thank you for your time! Any advice would be greatly appreciated.