Getting past Underwriting!! Second home is easier they said :/

[Akeim Fin]

So I bought my first home (duplex) using a VA home loan a few months ago. Everything went well and now I'm ready to buy my second home (triplex) but there's a problem, Underwriting!!

I am being told by numerous lenders that I can't purchase a 3 family using an owner occupied FHA or conventional loan at that matter. Instead I need to put 25% down because I am seen as an investor. Despite planning on living in the future triplex they are telling me at best I can get another Duplex, and that will be a stretch that requires some selling to underwriting. After asking why their response is the same "People don't go from a 2 to a 3 instead they go from a 2 to a 2 or a 2 to a single family. Gong from a 2 to a 3 family is seen as unusual and appears that I am trying to be an investor and not put down any money."

How do I get around this hurdle? Has anyone else been told this before?