Newbie - Underwater Home, First Time buyer, What Should I do?

[Jacquelyn Revere]

Hello, my name is Jacquelyn, I've been listening to the podcast for a while but this is my first post. This is a long question, hopefully you guys can help me understand the best move to make. 

So, I want to invest. However, last year my mother began showing signs of early onset dementia. My mother was also taking care of my grandmother who already has dementia. I, an only child, quit my writing job in NYC and moved back home to Los Angeles to take care of the both of them. We all now live in the house my mother and grandmother bought. 

Unbeknownst to my mom, my grandmother refinanced the house twice then did a modification, we now owe much more on the house than we bought it for, however the home still has equity. I live in up n coming Inglewood area, less than a mile from the Forum, so our property value is rising quickly. The mortgage is paid by my grandmother pension, we don't know where the money from the refinance went, however i am working with a realtor who suggest putting my name on the property for another refinance. However if this happens will I lose my status as a first time home buyer and lose any incentives that I would get when purchasing my first investment property? 

All things aside  I want to make the best financial decision and not rely on my emotions.