Newbie looking for advice on refinancing and multifamily purchase

[Kalu Adane]

Hello, I apologize in advance if this post has been brought up in the forums. I searched and couldn't find a scenario exactly like my own so I thought it couldn't hurt to post.

Quick background:
My wife to be purchased a home in 2015 for 310k. Then we got married. According to Zillow/Redfin, the house is currently valued at 665k. Our goal is to purchase a multifamily unit and house hack it somehow. The market in Bothell, wa is super competitive for Multifamily properties. 

 I am now at a point where my credit is in the 800s, No debt, good paying salary.  We are trying to determine how we can purchase a multifamily unit. I spoke with her mortgage officer and he didn't make me feel confident about our options and did a poor job explaining how to utilize refinancing for our goal.  
Our goal is to either:
1. sell our home, and find a multifamily unit to house hack  
2. Refinance, take out some $ and use as downpayment on a duplex/Triplex under my name and hopefully only put down 3.5% since I am technically a first time home buyer. BUT because my wife is currently not working, if we refinance, it'll have to be under my name.  

My question is this: Would I lose a lot of benefits as a "first time" home buyer if I refinance now? I want to make sure that I don't blow my first REI purchase.
Thank you in advance. I appreciate it.