How to strategically capitalize on your time at networking events

Question

I've just finished reading a couple articles that give basic tips and encouragement on getting out there and connecting face to face with others.  Very important information, but I would like someone to help expound on just how to connect with strangers.
Here's my dilemma, I don't have a job/career remotely close to the RE world.  I work in a restaurant, and I don't like the question, "So what do you do?"  How can I transform my thought process and response to reflect what I would like to do (without sounding like I'm selling myself) but also being transparent and personable with my honesty--I'm just not professionally doing the work I'd like to do long term. This article, "Fix your elevator speech"
http://www.inc.com/marla-tabaka/fix-your-elevator-speech.html
 did makes some good points.  I just need help tweeking the advice to fit my situation.  Any ideas?

Iris Burrows · Answer

Great feedback, so work on my elevator speech and focus on my intent as an investor, not my current full time position. @rachel leonard which gareia meetings do you find most helpful, especially as your first visit option?

Rachel Leonard · Answer

Hi Iris Burrows. I'm in the Atlanta area and also felt a bit awkward about networking with RE investors. I'm a stay at home mom so don't tend to have too much in common with others in the industry. I joined the Georgia REIA and go to lots of meetings. I find that it's not an issue - no one is concerned about your 'day job'. They just want to talk about property and deals.

Troy Fisher · Answer

I too work in the restaurant industry. I'm a general manager for a national QSR concept.  If someone is going to look down at me for what I do then screw them.

But in all honesty when I ask people, "So, what do you do?" I would be kind of shocked if they answered, "I'm an office manager."  I don't; and most investors that I've met don't, care about the 9-5, but what you do in real estate.  My response is, "I'm a buy and holder, looking to transition into large commercial properties, and you?"  The best bet, and the people that I meet that are just starting out that listen intently, and ask pointed questions, are the ones that I start to respect.

The key to developing a reputation is consistency.  Don't go to one, and expect to be involved in conversations unless you are an active investor. Make it a habit to go to meetings.  Once you have been around a lot and listen and introduce yourself and show that you are progressing you'll be invited to join conversations.  I attend 4-5 meetings a month.  Be active in going to meetings.

I'll make an assumption that you are new to Real Estate and looking to get involved in birddogging and wholesaling so my Elevator Speech would be simple and like Karen Margrave suggests use the pitch to involve the asker; "I'm a wholesaler/birddog building my buyers list as my marketing engine is gearing up, What kind of properties would you be interested in me bringing to you?"

Iris Burrows · Answer

Ladies, thank you all for replying to my post, I appreciate the advice and the information. Last month I set a few short term goals for myself including going to some networking meetings--the meeting I attempted to attend on the deadline of my goal was cancelled.  It was my fault for waiting until the last minute to pic a meeting.  
Karen Mikolainis, The breakdown of your meetings, very helpful, I could see myself pacing the room and not just rushing into anything to avoid being disingenuous.  Also, I'm from Wisconsin, born and raised in Kenosha--ever heard of it? How close are you to Milwaukee and do you ever attend REIA meetings there?
Karen Margrave and Ann Bellamy thank you for the conversation starters.  I can talk, and I can listen, but in unfamiliar territory, it can be intimidating as to what to say.

Karen M. · Answer

Thanks Dawn, I was very excited to meet you!  :)   
BTW congrats on the "popular poster" award.

Dawn Anastasi · Answer

Karen, I spoke to you at your 4th REIA meeting and I thought you were a great conversationalist!

Karen M. · Answer

I am still working up to asking more questions HERE...  one at a time...

Karen M. · Answer

Hi Iris, as a total newbie, I'm not worried so much about 'making the most of my time,'.... yet....  I want to take the time and put in the time to get a feel for networking.

1st REIA meeting -- I just took it all in.  Talked to a friendly, chatty, lady who runs a title company.  I'm not exactly sure what a title company does yet, but I'll get there.   Listened to what other people were talking about...  went to the newbies corner during meet/greet and listened to the newbies talk...  Met someone from BP

2nd REIA meeting -- Introduced myself, listened more, met another BPer and someone going into property management.  Met another person over the break who is into rent-to-own, listened and learned little about solo 401k.

3rd REIA meeting -- said "hi" to JScott from Bigger pockets.  met a lady from my kids' school who is into flipping.  More listening.

I will work up the courage to start asking questions.  So far I am getting more familiar with the group.  I am starting to get familiar with some meeting regulars and will take it one step at a time.  When I have a clear picture of my goal or what I want to buy/do... I will present it and that should be great fun.

Good luck! --Karen

Karen Margrave · Answer

Iris Burrows Ann is right. Don't worry about it! Everyone starts somewhere. Just say, Hi! My name is Iris and I'm new to REI. I've heard so many great things about this group, that I wanted to come here to observe actual investors. Do you mind my asking if you are an investor? (if so) How did you get your start? What advice would you give to someone just starting out? (or something similar)

Most people love talking about themselves, and most are very generous in sharing their knowledge. Early on in real estate I learned you answer a question with a question.. I like it. Make it about them, not you, but ask questions that will help you.

If you come across someone so arrogant that they think they're better than you... walk away and go find some one that has better character, don't take it personal. Have fun and good luck!

Ann Bellamy · Answer

If you are in a group of real estate investors, such as at a REIA, they aren't asking to know what your day job is, they are asking to know what you are doing relative to real estate investing.  So when you answer "I'm starting to research wholesaling opportunities" or "I'm looking for my first buy and hold duplex"  you are telling the truth, and you are telling them what they really asked for.  They don't give a rat's tookus what you do that's not related to real estate.    Half of them (or more) are in the same position you are.

If you are at another type of group, then you can answer similarly, because real estate is your new passion (I hope) and that's what you really want to network about.  "I'm searching for real estate for my portfolio" or "I'm seeking buying opportunities in distressed real estate"  or something like that.

You're not the first to ask this question, I'm sure some others will chime in with their versions.