Looking for REI mentor. Where do I start??

Question

Hi there,

My goal is to purchase my first investment property in Dallas this year but it’s been difficult navigating this all on my own (from CA). My husband is not interested in investing and no one close to me is doing this. How does one find a mentor/coach/advisor?

Thanks!

- Lily

Nathan Gesner · Answer

Go to NETWORK at the top of your screen and you can search for other investors and investment groups in your area. You can also check meetup.com or search facebook for real estate investment groups, clubs, or meetings in your areaA mentor can really accelerate your growth, no matter what level you're currently at. They can sharpen skills you already have, or expose you to things you've never even thought of. Unfortunately, a good mentor isn't always easy to find.Think about it. You're asking someone to spend a lot of time and energy to share what they've spent years - maybe decades - learning and developing. That's a lot to ask of a complete stranger! Why would they want to invest in you? How do they know their investment will not be wasted? What can you offer in return?You are far more likely to find a mentor through in-person networking and building relationships. The mentor will have an opportunity to know you, see your determination and will, and then decide to pour their time and energy into helping you develop. Go to NETWORK at the top of your screen and search for other investors and investment groups in your area. You can also check meetup.com or search facebook for real estate investment groups, clubs, or meetings in your area. Start building relationships and looking for someone to partner with.How to find a mentorNot every successful person will make a good mentor. Not every good mentor is a good mentor for you. Here are a few things to look for:1. They should have current experience and plenty of it2. A love for real estate investing3. A desire and ability to share their knowledge4. The ability to speak the hard truth with empathyIt doesn't matter how good a mentor is: if they don't mesh with you personally, it's going to be a disaster. That's why I stress the importance of building a relationship first. You need someone that clicks with you personally before engaging in a mentor/mentee relationship with the dedication and stress that may be involved.Where to find a mentorStart by looking within your existing network. Do you have a family member or friend that's achieved what you want to achieve? Remember, it doesn't need to be Grant Cardone! As a beginner, you can learn a lot from your uncle with a few rentals in another state or a co-worker that's on their second house hack. Make a list and start looking closely at each one to see if they are an option.If you can't find someone within your network, expand your network. This entails building personal / working relationships with people successful in the field. You could do this in the BiggerPockets forum, but it's hard to build relationships with people from other states behind a keyboard. Get out and rub elbows with local investors by joining a real estate investor group in your area. Even if you have to travel a couple hours, you have a much better chance of finding someone.How to approach a mentorOnce you've found a likely candidate, it's time to reach out and ask. Some tips:1. Have a goal. Let them know - as specifically as possible - what you are trying to achieve. If you walked up to Michael Jordan and said, "I want to be learn sports" he would walk away. If you told him you have been playing pickup games for the past year and need help improving your jump shot, now he has evidence you're motivated and a specific goal he can quickly help you work towards. Example: "I would like to build financial independence through real estate investing. I'm not sure what the right path is, but I've been reading about investing in owner-occupied, multi-family properties. I've crunched the numbers and if I could purchase three four-plexes in the next ten years, that would give me the financial independence I'm looking for."2. Make a short list of questions to ask. Even though they are the expert, you still need to ensure they are a good fit for you. This is an opportunity for you to confirm they have the expertise you need. You don't want to start a relationship to learn about storage units and then find out they only invest in single-family homes.3. Practice your pitch! How you approach the mentor demonstrates how you will approach real estate investing. If you don't do the homework, you will give them the impression you may not be up to the task of doing the homework with real estate investing. You should be able to express your goal in one minute and then expand if questions are asked. It sounds cheesy, but the best way to prepare is to work with a friend or two and role play. Think about what questions the potential mentor may ask and how you would answer. Practice these answers until they roll of the tongue. Be prepared to demonstrate what you've learned so far and how hard you will work to put their advice to work. This is a two-way interview, so have a short list of questions to ask the mentor (What books do you recommend I read to gain a better understanding? What, specifically, would you recommend my first step be? How can I help you achieve your goals in exchange for you helping me?)4. Know how to take constructive criticism. A smooth sea never produced a skilled sailor (Franklin D. Roosevelt). You will make mistakes. You won't understand something and need it beaten into your head ten times. If you feel they're being too harsh, think about their intent. Maybe they communicate differently but have good intentions. If they're not challenging you, or your personalities just don't mesh, be prepared to give them honest feedback. Let them know if they're not a good fit and you need to move on.5. Pay them back. A successful investor's time may be worth hundreds of dollars per hour. They're willing to share it with you for free, so try to find ways to pay them back. I've heard of mentees that started out cleaning up construction areas on a flip at the end of each work day or picking up supplies at Home Depot and delivering them to the job site. Some mentees will act as a bloodhound for the mentor, knocking on doors, driving for dollars, scouring the internet, making cold calls, or performing other services that help the mentor find new deals. Your mentor has needs; try to meet them and develop a mutually beneficial relationship.A mentor can be very beneficial to your growth, but it's not as simple as one post on a forum full of strangers. Put in the effort, build relationships, prove your value, and improve your odds of finding someone to help launch you on your path.

Shiloh Lundahl · Answer

@Lily Kim There are a lot of opinions such as the opinion shared by @Eliott Elias who says not to believe in mentors and coaches but to go out and do it on your own. You could totally do that and you can learn from that experience. It makes me think of traveling from one place to another. You can walk to get the full experience of the journey or path, or for a cost you can take the bus and get there quicker. And if you want to get there even quicker, you can take a taxi or Uber, or you can take a plane. I guess it really depends on where you are going and if you want to fair the journey with your current knowledge or if you want a guide. I am someone who values guides and am willing to pay to accelerate the journey in order to get to the destination quicker. But I guess it is up to you to decide what type of person you are.

Lucia Rushton · Answer

@Lily Kim if you have the financial resources to do a project on your own then find an investor seasoned realtor to be your boots on the ground. I just met with clients yesterday who I have helped them buy two investment properties here in DFW and they never saw either in person. They were very happy. You have to find someone you can trust. You don’t need to pay a mentor. As always just my opinion

Albert Bui · Answer

When finding partners to formulate your dream team make sure everyone is on the same page so that when you learn something new you’ll have everyone rowing in the same direction in terms of skill set and mindset/knowledge. This tip will help you effortlessly proceed forward in your endeavor while not expending as much energy retraining your accountable to get on the same page as your goals or your lender or agent on investing principles, cashflow, concepts, or strategies.

Eric Yu · Answer

Hi Lily! @Nathan Gesner wrote up a great post here. Look for local people in Dallas that are on BiggerPockets - I'm sure you'll be able to find someone who can help. Offer them value & see how you can help them. If you're willing to provide them value, they will likely reciprocate it back to you. Separately, look for local meetups in your area - I've always found it easier to get connected/close to people in person. That'll be a great way for you to get started as well. Best of luck & we're all here to help :)

Carlos Valencia · Answer

One way is to begin working in the industry as you will have the opportunity to meet all kinds of people in RE investing. I recently began my mortgage career early last year and have learned so much on RE investing strategies from my current employer as they also have huge RE portfolio. But if your not able to work in the industry then reading books, listening to podcast, going to RE meet ups and being in bigger pockets will help you meet some people where they might be happy to mentor you in this market. @Albert Bui @Matthew Kwan

Eliott Elias · Answer

I don't believe in mentors and coaches. If you talk to 10 different investors they each will have their own opinion on the market and how to buy. Do it on your own and make your own mind up.

Marie Tan · Answer

I got mentored at same time showing me how it actually done by helping me get my first deal with him and his team.

Steven Foster Wilson · Answer

I think it is great Lily that you are trying and pushing on. Network and call around. I would call around to different brokerages, find someone who is doing what you are doing and ask them to meet. I like to try to set up every month a meeting with someone I think I can learn from or who could be a potential mentor. I always come full of questions and ready to learn. Many are specific to the individual that I am meeting with but there are some questions that I have taken from John Maxwells book "Good Leaders Ask Great Questions." "You may want to use them too: What is the greatest lesson you have learned? By asking this question I seek their wisdom. What are you learning now? This question allows me to benefit from their passion. How has failure shaped your life? This question gives insight into their attitude. Who do you know whom I should know? This allows me to engage with their network. What have you read that I should read? This question directs my personal growth. What have you done that I should do? This helps me seek new experiences. How can I add value to you? This shows my gratitude and desire to add value to them." These can be a great starting point for you. I have been blown away at how many people are willing to meet if you just ask, even big-time investors or developers.

Joseph P Finkelstein · Answer

Hi Lilly,What part of CA are you from? There are a lot of local investor networking groups, you might have some success meeting someone that can mentor you there. If you are in the So Cal region, I can give you some recommendations.