Holding it is really just waiting for appreciation and I think that qualifies as speculation and not investment.

It may vary between different lenders, but technically what qualifies as your primary residence is merely the home you live in for the majority of the year (4/7 days a week should satisfy that requirement),  There are some nuances to this rule, I'm sure, so be sure to speak with a lender who has a lot of experience with FHA.  

You should definitely talk to an attorney, but the general hard money lender loaning at 11-15% and 3-5 points shouldn't qualify as predatory. 

In a reverse exchange you locate your replacement property first and buy it in a specific manner using an exchange accommodating title holder set up by your qualified intermediary.  

I saw there were several VA's that seemed highly qualified but wanted to know if anyone has seen success with it as of yet? 

That would involve either showing proof of funds or talking to one of my preferred hard money lenders to get pre-qualified based on income and assets.  

Here are some examples of the more common types of permissible and non-permissible expenses when a 1031 Exchange is involved: Permissible Selling Expenses and Closing Costs: Owner's title insurance premiums Escrow agent, settlement agent or closing attorney fees Real estate broker's commissions Finder fees or referral fees 1031 Exchange Qualified Intermediary fees Documentary transfer taxes Recording or filing fees Attorney fees and costs related to the disposition or acquisitionTax advisor fees related to the disposition or acquisition Non-Permissible Operating Expenses, Financing and Closing Costs: Financing or lender costs such as loan fees, loan points, appraisal fees, mortgage insurance premiums, lender's title insurance policy premiums, and other loan processing fees and costs Prorated Property taxes Prorated rents Insurance premium payments Security deposits Payoff of credit card balances Repairs and/or maintenance costs

We keep freaking out that it'll ruin our chances of qualifying for land/construction loan.

Talk to your lender about a conventional loan, and what you can do to qualify.

I've went into the bank to see how much of a loan I could qualify for based off the amount of income I'm making while working part-time through college.