Our customers can wash AND dry their clothes in under an hour or less than the competition; they can lounge in the recliners or work on their laptop with our wifi; their children can play with toys instead of ask when they get to leave every 3 minutes.

I believe that the problem stems mostly from having to pay them fully upfront. 

Are there any title companies that do "dry" double closes here?

Kids are just going to get more expensive.Plus, in 18 years once they've bled the adoptive parents dry, they'll look you back up anyway, Win win.

More specifically I am torn between water or dry lot.

After that, you are replacing dry wall and possibly studs to get rid of the existing mold.Do you have pictures of the damage?

If he has buyers, the only advantage they have is knowing it's a done deal before the ink is dry, but if there is some ten day rejection period, that slows down the transaction more than a straight listing.

No offense meant by reputable - the few people I know who have used architects in this area have had horrible experiences - mostly stemming from communication issues. 

Right now, you're facing the same thing a lot of other listing agents are facing: demand is drying up as buyers try to make sense of what the market is doing.

After it's all dry, a regular painting 1-2 coats should make everything look new.