Since then, I have bought two more homes, one being my primary residence and one a pure rental I've never lived in.

I think it will cost you $20 but food and drinks are included.

I am looking for a purely investment duplex in the $100k and below range.

If you are ever in SF I'd love to grab a drink and talk REI.

A bottle of very good wine is always a welcome gift (if they drink wine of course) and 2 very nice wine glasses.  

Pure, fu****g NONSENSE! 

Put in LOTS OF LOUD KIDS, overnight parties, drinking, LOUD music, and throw in some weed for additional fun.

I have accepted sex offenders and declined younger applicants for twice being arrested for under age drinking.

Many cities have smelly or dirty water which is safe to drink, but still doesn't taste great.On the smell and water quality, make sure your response to her is documented.

I suppose it's possible that a few pure cosmetics will give you enough value add that you can refinance, but my experience is that you are taking a house that's not really habitable, making it habitable, getting a renter, and then refinancing it, proving that it has market value by virtue of looking decent and having renters.