So, for those who are much more experienced-how do I handle phone calls in a simple, professional way?

I grew up in the area (Maryland) and attended school in state before moving up to NYC and then SF for work in professional services (consulting, strategy) and technology.

Even single professionals want two bathrooms, especially if one is en suite master.

Many investors in other countries, unstable areas, are not phased by having partial principal loss, because that's just a feature of most of their economies, and when they are making money they're making so much of it so obscenely that losing some principal is just a cost of doing business. 

Account Closed  rocket mortgage mortgage is hardly the authority in mortgage lending I’d recommend finding a local professional and get a second opinion.  

I really love the idea of rentals but man it's hard to stay motivated with all the negativity around you not only from people you know but even some professionals in certain businesses.

Even if I agree with your premise that having a non-rounded purchase price makes the loan process more difficult (I don't cede this point at all btw because you have not provided any objective proof of its impacts) It is a minor problem at best, that any professional should be able to over come.

Try searching on www.Narpm.org there you will likely get a better educated and more professional PM.

While there were many factors in moving to Salt Lake (professional, personal, lifestyle, etc.), one large reason was for the “underratedness” we see in the city and the opportunity for entering into REI.

I recommend you familiarize yourself with your state's eviction procedures and tentant/landlord laws sooner rather than later, to protect yourself from professional tenants.