But I haven't figured out what to do about other bonus amenities, like keeping coffee and food items (like granola bars or smores kits)clean between guests.

Good music and good food!

@Darius OglozaWell there’s always going to be a risk/reward.

You may be able to find people that will pay more"I don't know, I've seen boxes like for dollar-type stores that do get filled, but can't believe they're getting the rates/terms the original franchise paid.The one's that are really tough are the burger/fast-food places. 

Of course BRRRRing has higher rewards than buying turnkey rentals, and higher risk too.

These types of loans aren't backed by Fannie/Freddie or any GSE and therefore rely on secondary market investors such as big hedge funds who balance risk vs. reward. 

You will need guns and food.

You have all the risk and all the rewards.  

Imagine that with chicken, beef, or how about food in general?

Thanks for all the food for thought!