He acted like neutral third-party helping us navigate the paperwork, we did not have the impression that he was doing any heavy lifting for us.

You can also contact a third party vendor and sign onto their list. 

.: What you mention: Your SDIRA and yourself own 50% each of the real estate, there are some factors to consider prior to completing the transaction:Biggest one being Enabling: Did you (as a disqualified party), enable your SDIRA to complete the transaction?

I got a text at about 11 pm from a tenant complaining that the downstairs neighbors were having a loud party.   

The best part is petroleum will rebound in a few years and housing prices will jump in the areas that are becoming depressed.

Coming over during a 2 years old's Saturday afternoon bday party to tell them there were too many people at the house (there were 15, and nothing in the lease prohibited this.)

(my limited experience on this latter part is with USBank)

Regardless of the primary residence issue, I'm pretty sure you can't 1031 with the owner of the replacement property being a part of the LLC for the other property.....related parties.

Now we're looking to get a third, though it's different (niche and area).

Only about a third of it is in the bank and the rest is cash in hand.