You should talk about to your tax man and come up with a % that your going to consider personal vs rental property as I’m sure you know this is very important come tax time.Be sure and remember your security deposits as well, you don’t want to mix that money up either.

So, I borrowed $15k from my roommate for earnest money to secure the property, advanced another $15k or so from my credit cards to cover points and closing costs, and advanced another $20k buffer (using 0% interest promotions on the cards -- I also had perfect credit), and bought it and celebrated.I had a contractor lined up that was a referral by my realtor, who had sold me my own home.

With what you describe, it doesn't sound like your wife is completely against mortgages and debt, it just sounds like that paid off property is and asset in your family's financial 'toolbelt' so to speak that she takes a sense of security in knowing is paid for. 

Securing a ton of debt is great while everything is great, but a bank can call your loans due if they get spooked.

Are the tenants paying regular and on time?

When they sign the lease, the deposit transfers and becomes the security deposit.

Her first month's rent/security deposit check bounced.

However months later when the lease was up and there were other items I deducted from his security deposit, he protested. 

...i reached out to an investor asking that i be added to their vip cash buyers list, as i have been given the green light by several buyers to bring sellers to table. she sent me a deal - its great, off-market in north cali with around 40 units, fully entitled. so i sent the deal to my cash buyers list and immediately got a buyer who wants it. i asked my investor friend if she pays a finders fee and she said yes...but since i know that my cash buyer is more than happy to pay above to asking price for the deal, id rather secure the contract myself and then assign it to my buyer but one obstacle i might face is that my pof isnt for 10 million its about half of that....with getting this contract myself also i dont have to worry about next time my buyer going directly to my investor and getting future deals that would leave me cut out of the deal.

- 4 units or less can secure conventional residential financing (if you want to live in one unit you can even get an FHA loan). (3).