What is a better offer: 1) all cash (show proven available amount at offer) for $140k or 2) a $145k financed offer with me waiving my finance contingency.I think I can come up with cash but it would tap me out plus it would come from a few other private money sources.

could anyone recommend a Tulsa attorney who is "fluent" in private lending?  

You buy it for 239k need 40k for work = 279k. there are many private /portfolio /hard money lenders that would lend you 224k so that you need 56k plus fees to complete the purchase and repairs.If you don't know any lenders that do this type of stuff send me a email.

I understand that I can do a private investor but how can I locate one of them.

I think you would be better off either partnering on this or using private funds.

There are about seven gated communities in the Pocono's and a good number of Private Communities  and they all serve a purpose: some are excellent for seasonal recreational activities while others due to location are excellent for commuters.   

If I were to receive a loan from any one of the recommended sources, such as private loans, hard money, seller financing, etc, for property that I want to rehabilitate and then rent; while I am rehabbing and placing the property on the market, how likely am I able to be granted the permission to defer payments for the loan until I get tenants?

Especially if you have a family..You are only in this business to make money not take risks like that.If you are able to get a great deal on a property to flip you can just as easily find an investor/private money to fund the down payment and get hard money for the remaining amount.  

Or does one usually get involved with private sellers?

But investing requires capital unless you find a deal where the purchase + repairs + closing and financing is less than 75% of the after repair value (ARV) - in which case you can find a hard money or private lender to fund the whole thing up front and after you refinance into long term financing or sell, you'll have almost none of your own money in the deal.