(I felt really bad for him, and am not at all on board with shaming your kid like that, so I was matter-of-fact "Okay, no problem" and gave them new sheets/took the old ones and washed them; the end)

Another Lender option is the "Hard Money Lender" which is usually the last choice, charges higher interest and points, and is usually short term. 

Bad metaphor maybe, but to me IRR is key.An example might be a 30yr vs 15 yr loan.

Dude in 99% you are dealing with a wholeseller who as a bad deal.

It was so bad that sediment was pouring through the walls.

I’m feeling nearly inundated with information streams, which isn’t a bad thing.

The last thing you want to do is get under contract with a bank owned house, then waste two weeks trying to find a contractor and then end up with a bad one that's hard to work with. 

We have not opened any new credit cards at this point so since the bad credit we’ve never started building good credit.

However, most likely interest rates will be going up significantly, so if you sell the bond you may be forced to sell at a discount.If you are willing to hold onto an investment for at least 5 years (longer is ideal) and are comfortable with volatility, index funds might be a good choice for you. 

I see many first timers use a standard Realtor and they make a bad choice because they do not get the guidance they need.