This amount of equity now lets me leverage enough credit to buy another piece of land, where I can put up a dozen vacation rentals.

I agree with Will that if insisting on tiling over the existing walls you will need to rough up what's there to ensure a good bond, definitely agree there will be lots of dust and little pieces of tile to clean up/pull out of your arms, legs and any other exposed parts of your body...be sure to protect your eyes and wear a mask!!!  

I also agree with @Brian Pulaski about the accent pieces.

I have a good friend who is building an investment property on a piece of land in a successful neighborhood.

If it's really the advise you got, it's one of the worst piece of professional advice I've ever seen (and I've seen lots).1.The 16% VAT isn't a tax for Americans.

Do not compound your problems here by "hoping for the best" and getting a piece of paper from her this weekend and assuming all is well.  

Final piece of advise, leverage any small tight nit community you happen to be a member of.

I recently picked up a Blink system - it's pretty good but a blue LED light comes on when the recording starts and cannot be disabled (you can open it up and put a piece of electrical tape over it though).

So basically my dad has offered to give me a massively big piece of the pie without a whole lot of risk on my end.  

I couldn't lay a piece of tile 3 years ago, holes in dry wall scared me, and bugs...don't get me started.