I feel I was upfront with everyone, and did what I was asked, so I'm frustrated that anyone would suggest that I am somehow liable for the mistakes of others.I'm posting all this because I'm trying to help the buyer get through this mess.

Sounds like you did your research and it helped save you some time, money and frustration. 

@Zachariah HaysIt is very frustrating to see all of the 'reno in 1 month', 'turn in 2 weeks' and whatever else nonsense that exists on TLC or internet YouTube-land of 'successful' BRRRR deal 'tales' told by those who may have SUPER EFFICIENT, well established teams already in place.

I, and many of my neighbors, will not benefit in any way from this assessment, either because our houses don't have a decks or folks have been frustrated with the HOA and paid out of pocket to replace theirs.HOA plans to force this through.

I'm a little shocked because I wrapped a few other things into the loan that are related that need fixed on the property thinking that I would get 30% back on those as well...I'm a little frustrated and wonder where I went wrong, if I did.

Super frustrating and time consuming. 

Dealing with the city is frustrating and inefficient, so beware. 

You save a lot of money and time with cash purchases (using your HELOC) by avoiding the expense of financing and frustration with underwriters.

I can appreciate how frustrating it is for a contractor to waste a day on an estimate for a newbie.

I can imagine that this has been a frustrating process for you.