@Mohan Deep, in most situations you will never recover that money.

You can supplement the funds that you're taking out of your home through additional funds from hard money. 

If you just listen to the 1000+ podcasts of the 'real estate', 'money' and 'rookie' you would have a good base of knowledge. 

It'll be more work on the front and back end but can be a great way to make money.

And not using a hard money lenders or gap funders.

I am new to this so I am running out of ideas but in reality to start living together we need a 4 bd house for our 3 kids and a bunch of pets so we know it would be a house around $800K until we can make more money from our jobs and side hustles.

Yes I understand it's to make money, but could you elaborate more please?

The equity she wants is $55,000, which I don't have in cash fully, but I own a home now with that in equity, and I have money in an IRA. 

If you are using a hard money loan you just need 20% down.

The bank from my understanding will be writing off a loss on this loan as there is not enough money to go around.Here is where it gets interesting, there is a second lien on the properties from a seller of a hotel that the current owner of the 21 unit bought seller finance. obviously there is not enough money to get this guy paid off as the bank is already taking a loss.