Some people are just selfish while others are afraid of the competition.

If you are afraid of taking action yourself you may be projecting your fears on others who do as you sit back and do not.

If there is anyone who is out there not taking action it is because they are just afraid.

I am glad you reached out to Bigger Pockets Community on this forum, we have a lot of newbies that are afraid that they may say the wrong things and that's not the case.

I'm not sure which I'm more afraid of, California landlord/tenant law or out of state management.

And, don't be afraid to ask for help and guidance as you have already done here.  

I think everyone else was afraid of it due to the amount of work needed too.  

(I already have a lender in place.)Though I agree, he doesn't seem motivated enough - but I do think I could have done a better job at figuring out why he wasn't interested in seller finance and addressing that issue, but I was afraid of being pushy.At the end of the day, we ended on good terms, and he said he'll call if he changes his mind - not as good as getting the deal, but better than burning the bridge.

Don't be afraid to negotiate fees.

If it's an issue of the seller being afraid of not getting whatever equity you promised, she could consider taking a second lien for that amount so she will get it when the end buyer closes.