I have been separate for 12 years and am a civilian federal employee. 

And then the listing agent is going to have to splain to the civilian selling their house that yes we have a listing agreement for X but we really need to pay Y and it comes from your side ???

I just got back from overseas, and while I know I am not at the same age as you, sir, I have discovered the absolute importance of allocating exercise times to the daily schedule now that I am in the civilian world full-time.

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That number is not realistic.To refinance the property and get cash out it needs to be completed as in everything done and inhabitable, unless you do a short term expensive hard money loan and then refinance later and pay the costs twice. 

Tons of decrepit houses in WeHo, Melrose area, mid wilshire etc with ramps in front that have elderly inhabitants.

Keep a room inhabitable for him/her to stay.

The City near where I live where I am looking to build goes by a code that only says the smallest inhabitable room (living or a bedroom) has to be at least 7' x 7'  which is pretty tiny!  

"Civilians" so to speak, don't have access.

Look for military and civilian workers selling their homes, for transfers out of town, or trade ups for bigger homes.