Property Purchase : $4.0M 1031 Exchange Money: $1.05MHe has loan approval at 25% down for the commercial property and he will be pretty close to being completely wiped out with attorney fees and other allowed 1031 expenses. 

if it is just the financial side holding you back - let your bank be your partner… or see if you can borrow the money from a family member who knows and trusts you -  without actually partnering with them on the control of the deal itself (pay them interest - or even bring in on the lien to secure their position the first time) - but let them be the finances and you control the project. 

I would take that money and do one of a few things with it:1-Look for a JV partner to do a larger deal with2-Keep learning about the market and investing as a whole and sit on the money until you have enough education to leverage it3-Use the money to set up your real estate business and buy leads & marketing betting on yourself may be the best of the optionsAlso tread lightly around the leave NJ advice places like OH, Baltimore, even parts of South Jersey can be money pits where ripping off out of towers is a cottage industry.

it seems like a confluence of factors have made it difficult to get started - there is lots of competition for deals, both on and off market; money is expensive; the trades are booked up forever; etc. 

You're asking them to agree to wait for their money for several years, assume the risk of you stopping the future payments, and they have to pay some taxes on top of it!

Many of my neighbors rent their entire houses and horse facilities out on a month to month basis, and they tell me they make a ton of money. 

I lost money, hope you don't!

You should be able to take into consideration if the property makes sense as a rental when you move out, will it cash flow then after a few years, or will part of your strategy be to fix up your side while you live there and then either move into the other side at some point to fix it up or to just sell when you’re ready to move to a different location if it doesn’t cash flow at that point.

If so, you would need private/hard money so you can do renovations, and then AFTER you would do more of a permanent solution like a DSCR. 

I suggest building relationships for private money, this is how we fund out mobile home with land deals which we buy.