We replaced the deck, floors, popcorn, doors, kitchen and baths, added curb appeal natural light and a waterfall.

Correct, all of those loans can only be to a natural person. 

Naturally people will allow their emotions to control how they negotiate, because we as humans are wired to think emotionally before we think logically.

And it's located at the Hilton Garden Inn on Nature Center Way

The warping is to be expected with these sorts of doors, as wood naturally warps, and the design does not account for that.

I've purchased two homes with VA and done VA IRRLs over last 9 years and I've always thought entitlement worked as you do, but I finally learned the true nature just 2 weeks ago.

@Chris Allen, if you want to be thorough, make sure to account for the following expenses:1) Mortgage2) Mortgage insurance (PMI or MIP) or FHA Risk base3) Property Taxes4) City Taxes5) HOA (Home Owner’s Association) Dues and Fees and Assessments6) Insurance  a) Property Hazard Insurance (0.3-0.45%)  b) Flood Insurance  c) Earthquake Insurance  d) Umbrella Insurance7) Vacancy Rate (usually 8% - the equivalent to one month a year, or 5-6% if multifamily and/or if experienced, if not use 8%)8) Utilities (you’ll have these if your tenant is not covering them and/or during vacancy)  a) Water § Sewer § Garbage  b) Electricity  c) Natural Gas  d) Propane9) General Maintenance (usually 5%)  a) Upkeep § Landscaping  b) Snow removal  c) Repairs  d) New Appliances  e) Make ready10) Capital Expenditures (usually 5%, higher is the property is old and obsolete, less if fully rehabbed and all mechanicals and roof are new)11) Property Management (8%, even if you self manage, your time still has value and there might be a time when you'll want to be completely hands off or you'll not be able to do it, vacation, retirement, etc.), including...  

Here at least it would be a simple matter of going to the assessor and requesting the tax parcels be merged....which would not in any way change the nature of either the mapped or legal lot status.

But even so, natural gas could be ignited by other things too.It seems like every natural gas detector I see online is "plug-in" only.

Turnkey by its very nature you are paying a premium for.