Campgrounds (Like the one on Parent Trap)5.

As you said, it's trapped.

I've been listening to the podcasts, reading Rich Dad Poor Dad and other various real estate books, and I have found fresh determination to get in control of my life instead of letting life control me.However, I want to throw out there that I'm a typical middle class millennial who fell in the "go to college and get degrees that won't make you a lot of money" trap.

If it's near water, are there problems with flooding, soil erosion, insects, etc.? 

I haven't used it as of yet, though, and currently have no plans to, so all that appreciation is currently dead equity and isn't earning me much "trapped" in my one house.

I would just caution you at not falling into the lazy landlord trap.

He said he has the following issues with it and hasn't taken good care of it the last 15 years he's lived there (also built in 1977):- rotted wood all throughout the roofline- brick wall venier on one side of the house is falling apart- sheet rock in many places needs to be replaced- cabinets have never been painted or stained- carpet is over 20 years old- linoleum floor in the kitchen and hallway is yellow and peeling up- walls haven't been painted in 15 years- septic issues- a couple of leaks in the roof- possible insect / termite issuesSupposedly a lady has offered him $80,000 for it. 

No one wants to be trapped in a conversation with someone that just wants to sell their product when they aren't interested in it.That said, I have a totally different elevator speech when talking to a wholesaler about being a buyer of their properties, a different one for real estate agents, etc...just have to know the audience.I guess my point is that we can't all collaborate in this thread on developing the perfect elevator speech that works for everyone, but hopefully this all helps with ideas on developing yours.

The "pro-forma trap" will bite you if it doesn't prove to be accurate. 

I know that when my mom was in section 8 housing she had to bring proof of income every year.