The people I work with know me personally and it helps if you meet them face to face or have previously done a deal with them in some capacity so they feel comfortable with you.

Two kids later we are at that pivotal fork in the road where we are at max capacity with space and schooling for our oldest.  

I never again want to have to tell him that I cannot get him to a game because my department is not at capacity and I can't get off.

, that is not going to be suitable.A self-directed IRA is still in all ways an IRA, just with different investment capacity. 

Say the go for a refi, and get 70-75% of the ARV, now you're getting $140-150,000 back out, which you'll use to pay off the original Hard Money Loan.I'm making this scenario look pretty, tight, and nice for the sake of ease, but that's the gist.There are points, fees, interest payments, etc along the way.But regardless of where you live, whether you own a home, or even have a job, if you can come to the table with a good deal, that fits the lenders numbers/expectations, and you have the financial capacity to do the loan, the loan you will do...

All these tools optimize capacity to deliver it where it is needed. 

You can do that with self-directed IRA, or better with truly self-directed Solo 401k plan, which has significantly higher contribution capacity (get the max tax break now), does not require a custodian and offers you checkbook control over your account (just some of the benefits). 

@Jay Hinrichs,Brighton Bank will lend to out-of-state investors, but they say everything is contingent on credit quality and debt service capacity.

The difference is more likely in the capacity.

JUst wondering how many people investing in RE in any capacity hold a license.