The client cup of tea is loan assumptions with value add.

If it is not your cup of tea (because value adds are work), take the extracted $250k and put it in the index fund.  

Reading the tea leaves of the rates you’re discussing, I think I know the company.

That off-marketing deal finding stuff is not my cup of tea, personally. 

It also has an unusually high concentration of 2-4 family multi-family options to make your dollar go a little further, if a duplex or fourplex is your cup of tea.

if we stop reading the news, social media, do not have cable/tv, drink milk tea, watch fifa world cup, the world is just okay

If you're set on investing out of state, I'd recommend reading this article by David Greene for starters: https://www.biggerpockets.com/blog/core-four-real-estate-tea...If possible, it's a good idea to visit the market you plan to invest in to familiarize yourself with the area and it's also a good way to network.

There are tons of properties here that cash flow super high on paper, but they wouldn't be my cup of tea.

It's not for the faint of heart, or an easy cup of tea to drink. 

(I suggest reading this article below)https://www.biggerpockets.com/blog/core-four-real-estate-tea...Columbus, Ohio is a great market to consider if you're leaning towards appreciation.