I've also heard about rolling over some money into a self directed IRA to invest in real estate, but that doesn't really solve my problem. 

Remember, the notion of amassing wealth without investing is a dangerous myth perpetuated by self-proclaimed experts.

We self-financed this deal.

Other ways of using SDIRAs could be to invest in syndications, performing  or non-performing debt, precious metals, raw land, precious metals, mobile home parks, self-storage facilities and more. 

From what I’ve read in Bloomberg, electing S-Corp taxation for your LLC might reduce your self-employment tax burden when you start paying yourself a salary.

With your experience, having sufficient capital to cushion any mistakes is important.

There is a mortgage so that also adds to the amount desired, though my inexperienced self still feels it would sell for a pretty penny once fixed up.

You need sufficient rental income to cover your expenses, or you bleed money. 

The alternative is to set up a self-directed IRA, or better, a truly self-directed Solo 401k plan, invest in alternative assets, and then do the conversion.

And I wouldn't expect them to, it's a self inflicted thing.