I have a pair of tenants almost exactly as you described.  

But then everyone would be zillionaires, and our dollar would worth as much as the Zimbabwe's currency. 

Paying off some of our debts and then reducing the amount of currency in circulation should bring the value of the dollar back up to a level where it is again a strong & meaningful world currency.

However, the reserves do not necessarily have to all be in cash - short term debt instruments or my favorite, a diversified Currency fund to reduce exposure to the dollar.

Do what the police request.As to your paranoia, see a shrink and you need to grow a pair if you are going to be in real estate!

What's the odds of some no-fold-em-hold-em player hanging on with a pair of deuces and making a hand on the river?

Anyway a couple months ago, I was at one of our apartment communities, when a pair of church ladies were going around knocking on doors.

In a few words we are seeing the byproducts of grossly desperate Fed policy (ZIRP,QE, etc.) from massive asset deflation, currency wars and foreign capital circumventing capital controls into the new Swiss Bank Account (western RE with a shell company).  

If you're going to be changing them yourself or hiring someone else to do it, buy a pair of washable, electrostatic filters.  

Winning the lottery would meet my investment goals, but I won't play because I know the odds and have no way of influencing them in my favor.I have little respect or patience for anyone who glosses over these risks, and I'm glad that you do not provide your clients with a complementary pair of rose colored glasses, that is the sign of a true professional IMO.I still disagree with the degree to which the risks can be assessed and mitigated by a newbie investing out of state, even with due diligence, and this is due to my experience as a non-newbie doing all the due diligence described, going through 7 property managers in 5 years, and still not being able to find a single solitary one that was willing and able to do the job without repeatedly trying to rip me off or leave any profit on the table.