This is a classic case of trying to separate personal tastes from what gives a kitchen the most "Pop!"

This appears to be a classic case of an agent not educating a buyer on what a short sale entails.

Then value add an ADU (as large as you can build - 1200’ + giant garage (4 car: think repurpose later) for instant increased equity.  

I love hotels in repurposed banks esp in DC/NY.

In the interests of brevity I'll get right down to where I'm at:- I am educating myself, starting to network, have started looking for deals and swapped numbers with some sellers- I have capital - I own a home overseas (through an inheritance) that will get sold - educating myself for this sale was how I stumbled into Rich Dad... woohoo cashflow 101 classic online game mindset changer!!

If you have family or friends that live in the South or Mid-West, start looking at rentals there, as these are classic cash flow areas....probably not going to make you 10% year-over-year appreciation like Oregon has the last 7 years, but you'll convert your appreciation into monthly cash flow. 

Also looks like current renters are buried under a mountain of stuff, including an old classic car, which tells me they're not wanting to leave anytime soon.

These are of course classic signs that your roof needs to be replaced.

Sounds like you have the classic example of finding a “deal” but finding out it’s not motivated seller.

Perhaps shifting to work for a startup might free you up out of the corporate America's stuffiness.2) Devote More Time To Your Hobbies: Don't know how much free time you have, but perhaps you can increase the amount of time you spend fixing up dirt bikes and rebuilding classic cars with your kids.