I am about to start a 1031 and wondering if I should use them or somebody else ?  

The relationship is straightforward and you don't need to know much else legally.

Has anyone else encountered a situation like this?

Pretty,  as others have stated here, the permitting process through the City of Cape Coral has been hindered by their ability to scale up their staff to handle the massive demands for all permitting including new construction but also anything else that requires a permit, home improvements, sea walls, alternative sea walls, pools and more.From your post, I can see that you are frustrated, and I believe some of that is due to not understanding the steps and processes of new construction, including what must be done prior to submitting permits.

And are you thinking single-family, multi-family, or something else?

Not sure, i guess check in with me in another 8 years :)  But I do know I wouldn’t be happier doing anything else.

Best advice to you would be to use that VA loan as many times as you can and buy primary residences for a year, rent them out and then buy something else with the VA!

those properties sitting on the MLS property won't work... because if they would, someone else would have bought them already. 

What happens if you lose on it, you now have an additional liability, not just a loss of money.Are you planning on keeping the current property or exchanging it (1031) into something else?

Anything else is GAMBLING.You can think your gonna "find a great team" but heres the catch; If you know diddly-squat about that market, how do you know what is a "good" team member or not?