Realistically, what would you want to see from a private lender?

You can purchase the first one with a private loan from your dad or cash to minimize risk, and leverage a second or third property with a bank loan and the rest of your cash.

I'm familiar with how a hard money loan is structured, but structuring a deal from a private lender seems like the wild west.

Quote from @Kevin Akers: If you have everything else in place (financing, permits, etc) and have underwritten the deal where the numbers make sense you can work on raising the 50K from private investors. 

For the last 22 years I've been involved in real estate as a house flipper, with extensive experience in building and renovation contracting, owned a residential property management company, and now have a private money lending business (licensed NC re broker).

If it's private money, they would issue a letter.

I think BP is a great place to get people publicly together and then they can create a private group.

fix and flips are the vast majority of the targets for private lenders.

So I had an idea to get a loan from a Private lender for 400K (just under the asking price of the home) this house is already appraising for over the asking price but need some TLC.

However, depending on the Trust Company you work with, you might have more options with respect to the diversity of public and private market investments.