If they would open it up to dealing directly with the bankers, the speed of the recovery would pick up steam very rapidly.

I introduced them to a mid-sized brokerage in the area (from what I’ve heard, they’re picking up steam) who specialized in finding off-market opportunities that don’t get plastered all over Zillow.

I would imagine it ended with him making no money as this sounds like the biggest steaming pile of poop I have ever heard of.

. :) Full steam ahead!

Utilities.Tenant agrees to pay for all utilities connected to the property such as sewer, cable, television, telephone, water, steam, gas, waste, trash, or electricity.

Otherwise, this is just blowing off steam.  

We also keep an inexpensive steam cleaner in a closet in case there are any accidents.

IN northern Ca we had a lot of steam wells where hereto for mineral rights were there but not that valuable or any value..

Maybe add into your lease that the carpet needs to be steam cleaned when they move out (they need to provide a receipt for the rental of the machine or from the cleaning service). 

You need to do more than a day of fixups - painting, carpet steam cleaned, cleaning all drawers and appliances, exterior touchups.You have a "perfect" process set out, but it's one that will push you to make a bad tenant decision and not vet them properly.