This practice had been prevalent in the days of simultaneous closings (SIMO).

Some of these are happening simultaneously.1) You find yourself wanting to get involved in real-esate2) you need to educate yourself on the many different techniques, or as you feel your way through you realize its overwhelming and you want to just pick an easy way but you realize you still need education.3) You need to find which method of REI sounds appealing/within your means (maybe you have money but not time, or time but not money, maybe this is your primary income or a side hustle...)

Our current situation is that the HELOC balance enables us to go on 2-3 properties simultaneously if we're getting properties at say $30-70k a piece.To answer your question specifically - you won't do a HELOC on your investment property. 

I'm by no means advocating an all nuclear solution; as I said in my post above, this is an issue that calls for many different solutions to be tried simultaneously.

However, correct me if I'm wrong but, going this route probably isn't the way to accomplish both of my goals, somewhat, simultaneously right?

I mean I have to sign those on construction loans. when I am building specs and the bank knows full well I am not going to move into 20 homes I am building all simultaneously. 

I would recommend a side gig to help you increase your income, and simultaneously, eliminate any debt you have which will help boost your credit score.

I would simultaneously hit her with an eviction notice.I can do that because my state is reasonable and I can evict in under 30 days.

Usually what I do to not disclose my fee is a simultaneous close, but the ultimate buyer I am working with does not want to do a double escrow.

Thus you can lower your DTI while simultanously increasing your credit score by getting a debt consolidation loan, since it can lower your credit utilization percentage (if you have credit card debt) and it can lower your total monthly minimum payment(s), leaving more of your income available to qualify for the mortgage loan.Another method I once used to get around DTI and credit score issues caused by debt was to take a loan from my wife's TSP (Military 401K), then used that money to pay off the debt that was causing the issue.