They have good food and damn good carrot cake.

I know to the experienced investor this is a piece of cake, but as a new investor these are moving parts I haven't dealt with yet. 

Commercial lending was still cake (even though I couldn’t refi my own home that I owned for 12 years l, never missed a payment, wasn’t looking to pull cash, etc)Tl:dr: stay away from 1-4 fam loans and you should be fine 

Now, its also possible to use an IRA to invest in real estate, so you can have your cake and eat it too, BUT it makes investing more complicated. if you want to try that route, you better do some research first.

The higher end (> $4 mil) has softened, but starter SFH’s in the cheaper hoods ($1-1.5 mil) are still selling like hot cakes.

I am evaluating some of my first potential buys, but I could use some guidance to determine when a property is not a good deal because of the parameters of the property or when it is not a good deal because I am expecting to have my cake and eat it too. 

Basically, if its a good deal already then its just icing on the cake to be in the zone.

You can not have your cake and eat it to. 

Not a deal killer per se but I'd be wary of owner financing when real estate is selling like hot cakes!

Sills are also caked with dust.