Hours later, he has done two Home Depot runs (which we paid for), installed two doors, failed to fix the running toilet, and brought his “old lady” over to “help.” 

Should they be able to watch Netflix on the toilet, or in the back yard?

One of the strangest things I've seen is a tenant complaining that a toilet is too old thus causing him to miss the toilet (obviously the toilet was not the problem).

Remote rehab for someone with no experience is about as risky as it comes.MI  will take good care of you.. better to get REAL returns than paper returns that never pan out.or jump into a long distance rehab only to have the contractor walk off with your  money and materials or both.once you get some experience you may want to choose that path.or there are companies that will do the BRRR but very few and you have to pick the right one .. 

I've been knocking out debt for a while so cash-flow is high without getting more tenants and more toilets. 

My biggest expenses are toilet paper and soap. 

Especially if the market slows down.With our home, the kitchen was good, but it had carpet and nasty bathroom tiles, so we did that, repainted, and put in new toilets from Costco, and the over $14K we spent on that seems to have added about $30K already to the home value, probably more in the future as we have long-term appreciation. 

the classic example of this was Morris invest.. they got a BP pod cast and of course top notch marketer with some TV celeb power behind him and they go and lay away 1000 investors into stuff that was either straight up loser to start to stuff that will never pan out over time.his videos were rudimentary like drawing stick figures .. he had this saying whats your freedom number  and would show 10 of these at 800 a month and there ya go. 

We had simple jobs like changing washers and leaky toilets, leaks under the sink, so when a tenant complains, he quotes $100, does the work and sends me the bill, nice and simple.

NEVER accept a pre-qualification letter...it's only slightly less useful than used toilet paper.