But surely @Scott Trench I learned from BP that REI is a long game. 

While it is possible, and more likely than in areas that are not rent controlled, investing is, for many investors, a game of probabilities, and each time a tenant leaves is an opportunity to reset rents at market - which rises much faster than rent control. 

How can I make my real estate investing game as efficient as Bumble?

Hey Jesse, Just like @Tony Savage said, wholesaling is a whole different game. 

Then you play this exact same game when you go to sell it, wee!

They are going to keep pushing you back further and further, and if you don't start the eviction process, you may be playing their games for another year or two.

Waiting for rate drops is not my idea of playing the game in a smart manner. 

So, it's a numbers game like anything else. 

I’m a new investor who desperately wants to get into the game finally.

It could still be really profitable, if you're the only game in town and you also can provide food or rent out part of the property for other business purposes, etc.