I feel like I've reached the point where I've armed myself with all I can and need to start taking action.

You might find you can only get a 20 year mortgage, possibly in the form of a 5 year arm.  

Basically, it's as if she and you are both starting at the beginning of your RE journeys, to find out whether she/you would be better off investing for appreciation (eg. buying property that should be ALREADY worth more than you pay for it, AND it's due to keep going up in value too, but, won't generate much net cash flow), or, buying for cash flow (in areas where appreciation has not happened historically, but are still golden egg locations for double digit net rent returns). 

You can throw all the money you want at legal fees, that doesn't make you right, it just means you were able to strong arm someone into compliance via a business decision.

Thank you and nice to digitally meet you all!

You'll be able to defer federal however and that would create a net benefit as long as the 1031 didn't cost you an arm and a leg (figure 750 for one).  

I know there are a lot of companies that have there have their own mgmt arm even at scale.  

It may take a few years to reach double digit returns and you need to be prepared for the next recession.  

It can be a hassle physically running around picking stuff up but most of my trusted subs are armed with my Lowes account cards.

In addition, your completed investments have delivered double-digit returns.