As a mental health professional, this sounds a lot like paranoid schizophrenia, meth psychosis, etc.

I have some ideas like giving their number out to wholesalers or whoever texts me 10 times a day asking if I need help finding health insurance, but I'd love to hear your ideas as well.

@Chris Lo not an issue unless deteriorating, which potential exposes people to the fibers and is thus a health hazard.Even then, all you have to do is properly encapsulate it, usually with paint and then put siding over it.What cities are you looking in?

Payroll, Health care, PTO, vacation pay.

Eventually I called FMC directly and spoke to one of the worst human beings I have ever come across in all my years.

Their fees are already negotiated down by your health insurance company! 

Reach out to their human resources departments and tell them about the special program you have for their employees (waived application fee, move in gift, etc.) 

The HUD inspection guidelines are built around safety & health. 

It's human nature (unfortunately).

@Adeeb Shaheer you aren't going to get through this script with most agencies, particularly in health care Q1 is good to ask for health care Q2 for health care is typically 13 weeks so skip it. for other groups it is worth asking Q3 is typically no for health care, these days at least.