So, to keep this post alive, here is what I offered and from a GAAP accounting standpoint I think it's reasonably generous. To sum it up they have a property that requires $65,000 in immediate repair - siding, new AC unit, and an unknown amount of mold remediation which I planned to do (drywall removal/installation and paint). The property was foreclosed, according to the realtor it was then purchased at auction by the bank for $255,000, originally listed by the bank for $650,000 and has been trickling down to $400,000 and the most recent offer they've had was "between 300 and 350." The property is 3,200 sq ft, last sold for $500,000 in 1994, and fixed up may be worth $650,000. The prices in the area are very inflated and most properties in the area that are listed above 400,000 are on the market for 6 months or longer. This one is no different and has been on the market since October.
The offer: 280k for the house, 60k into an escrow account for repairs, and I'll take out a mortgage through the listing bank at a 4% interest rate which is slightly above market for a mortgage. Generous for the bank because GAAP accounting allows the bank, upon selling the mortgage, write the profits of the entire mortgage into their books. It's called "mark to market" accounting and they would be able to record a sale of the house for 280, credit 60k for the escrow, then record the 280k mortgage as a debit of $480k. Pretty reasonable of an offer to put the repairs on the mortgage because it inflates the value of the mortgage while still giving me some $$$ to do the repairs. The bank would probably sell the mortgage at this point but they'd still be able to record decent profits on the sale of this house.
Here's what I did; I called the listing agent and asked if she would be interested in dual representation and naturally she said yes. Viewed the property with the field manager, she bragged about how most of her business is hedge funds, and when she asked what I was thinking basically walked off and said the bank is going to put the money into fixing it themselves. Okay lady, I'm sure those hedge funds will take care of you when you need it just like you did them.
I have no contacts at the bank and the realtors are going to make the process impossible so I've decided to walk away and save myself the trouble of doing 3 months of drywall and dealing with contractors.