All Forum Posts by: Denis Ponder

Yeah, that does make it tough.

Primarily, thank you for your service!  Phenomenal sacrifice and much appreciated!

Keep working it and grinding it out.  The nice thing is your equity will likely grow quickly in the area.  So, while you might not be able to save up as quickly, the gain in net worth could very much be worth the wait.

Looks to me like it's $6,800 based on the math in the parenthesis.

If that's the case, looks like OP bought a little too much house the first time around.  You might need to be patient and save up more money or look for ways to increase your W2.  It's going to take a little while to get there financially.  Can you house hack where you are currently to accelerate your savings?

House hack can be a MF where you still get the feel of your "own" home but you get an investment at the same time.  You can scale from there.

If you are planning to stay in the area long term, I recommend buying a primary.  Take advantage of the low down payment options and start to learn about buying a home/property and taking care of it.  You can build from that.

I also recommend waiting until you are married before you do.

Were they still calling it Harvard of the South when you were there.  LOL

Yes, exceptional value!!

What year did you graduate?  I was 2003.  My brother and wife are graduates of BC as well.

Agree here!  I grew up in Berea and lived there for 25 years.  That area shaped me and I loved it there.

Sounds like you have a great perspective!  The only thing I would challenge is getting adulthood down "right".  I'm not entirely sure what you mean by that, but this implies there is a right and wrong.  Perhaps shifting your mental to approach to a continuum of "Least Optimal" to "Most Optimal" is better phrasing.  I firmly believe many things in life belong on a spectrum of "Least to Most" rather than thinking of things strictly in terms of black and white, right vs wrong.  Either way, you are wrestling with some great questions for your age.  Keep being curious!  The beauty of being an adult is you get to define success however you want.  Define it, then pursue it.

Tough spot to be in.

First, it sounds like your parents really want what they think is best for you; that's great!  On the flip side, there is some conditional love at play here that you need to think through.  If left unchecked, conditional love can control your life.  If you aren't doing or pursuing anything unethical or immoral, once you are of age, you should go and pursue whatever you desire.  Just make sure you understand the outcomes/consequences.  Be calculated about it.  Until then, you have a duty to honor your parents so long as you can legally and safely do so.  I think most adults, at some stage, had to set boundaries with their parents for a myriad of reasons.  Their love and involvement appears to be well intentioned, be grateful and thankful for that.

You have choices to make, but each choice will provide its own set of challenges, consequences, hurt, disappointment, joy, reward, etc.  You have to analyze those possible outcomes and determine what you are comfortable with.  Is your pursuit of what you want more important to you than the approval of your parents?  That's a tough question to wrestle with.

Remember, parents are doing their best to protect and provide for their kids.  We don't have an instruction manual, crystal ball to the future, or a road map with guaranteed outcomes.  The world is an incredible place full of opportunity, but you need to understand how to navigate it and what you are comfortable accepting and rejecting.  It sounds like your parents want to set you on a path that has a high probability of some level of success and safety for your life.  That's admirable.  Your parents are striving to teach you some fantastic characters traits!  You are blessed.

Sometimes, people want more than that.  Or, they just want to get there on their own terms.  Or, they want something completely different for their lives.  Nothing wrong with any of that.

I'm more aligned with @Rick Albert on this one.  I pay quickly, call him first, refer him out, give him tools and such I don't need or use anymore, and let him keep anything that is salvageable from a project that I no longer need.

Probably should have done it the first time.  But, if you want to be nice, give them a warning after the first one then start the process the next time it occurs.  6 times in a row means it's probably time.

However, if they pay every month and you are collecting your late fee as well...  Maybe there is a silver lining.