@Sarah Rhee - Sorry to hear about your troubles, but it sounds like you are in a good position networth and equity wise. If you are looking for cashflow, the key is to transition the equity you have into assets that provide a higher return on equity (ROE). As of now, it sounds like you had a ton of equity locked up and it is not working hard for you.
You have a couple ways to access that equity.... you can 1031 your orange county property into a large multifamily and create cashflow that way. You can also HELOC your primary residence or RELOC the orange county property and transition that into cashflowing assets. Or you can even cross collatorize the properties to purchase other properties. Nonetheless, I agree... with your mortgage rate being so low, it seems like it makes sense to access the equity via other methods beyond refinancing.
Nonetheless, I implore you to do an exercise. If you grabbed equity from the orange county property via a HELOC and your current mortgage, what would be your blended interest rate taking into account both mortgages? And compare that to simply refinancing. You might find out that you have so much equity in that orange county property that the blended rate of the HELOC and current mortgage is higher than simply refinancing it and accessing equity that way. At the end of the day, I understand you want to keep a 4.5 or 2.5% mortgage however if you come to find out that by accessing those funds via a second mortage, your overall payments would be higher, it actually might make sense to refinance and use those funds to invest.