All Forum Posts by: Alex Bezu

The IRS decides to audit Ralph, and summon him to the IRS office.

The IRS auditor is not surprised when Ralph shows up with his attorney.

The auditor says, “Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I’m not sure the IRS finds that believable.”

“I’m a great gambler, and I can prove it,” says Ralph. “How about a demonstration?” The auditor thinks for a moment and says, “Okay, Go ahead.”

Ralph says, “I’ll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye.”

The auditor thinks a moment and says, “No way! It’s a bet.” Ralph removes his glass eye and bites it.

The auditor’s jaw drops. Ralph says, “Now, I’ll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye.”

The auditor can tell Ralph isn’t blind, so he takes the bet.

Ralph removes his dentures and bites his good eye.

The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three grand, with Ralph’s attorney as a witness. He starts to get nervous.

“Want to go double or nothing?” Ralph asks.

“I’ll bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on one side of your desk, and pee into that wastebasket on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in between.

“The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he looks carefully and decides there’s no way this guy can manage that stunt, so he agrees again.

Ralph stands beside the desk and unzips his pants, but although he strains mightily, he can’t make the stream reach the wastebasket on the other side, so he pretty much urinates all over the desk.

The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has just turned a major loss into a huge win.

But Ralph’s attorney moans and puts his head in his hands.”Are you okay?” the auditor asks.”Not really,” says the attorney. “This morning, when Ralph told me he’d been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty thousand dollars that he could come in here and piss all over an IRS official’s desk and that you’d be happy about it.”

P.S. If you don't laugh after this story, think about Einstein's success formula: 

Success = work hard + play with life + keep you mouth shut.

I also plan to come.

Welcome to the RE industry! Washington State Bar Association provides some transaction forms for limited practice professionals. There is a form called "Real Estate Contract" (4405irrev 32009). There are two versions of the form: short and long. Here is the link http://www.wsba.org/Licensing-and-Lawyer-Conduct/Limited-Licenses/Limited-Practice-Officers/LPO-Forms. However, as a new investor you are strongly advised to seek qualified help in drafting your forms. Using standardized forms such one above may not suit your needs best. An attorney may customize a contract having your best interest in mind, which will provide best protection to you as an investor.

When you go to the nearest Department of Licensing office, the one that issues vehicle titles, the teller at the counter will explain the procedure.

If I were in your situation, I would request copies of everything that I signed or initialed between me and the bank. Then, I would carefully read all these documents. After that I would demanded explanations of the hold based on the documents. Or else, if they place a hold under some statute, rule, or regulation, the bank should explain this action citing the applicable authority.

You should find a investor-friendly escrow company that would agree to do "two closings" in one transaction. Technically it will be only one closing. For you it will be an assignment where on HUD-1 you will be paid a pay-off as a lien holder. Double closing always require two separate transaction, even if both are done on the same date. Some companies provide transactional funding for this one closing day at a 5-7% fee. I don't know if an attorney will provide as transactional funder unless he is allowed to do that in your jurisdiction.

The short answer is yes. In Washington, contractor's license is required in order to flip. However, there are exemptions. One has to carefully read RCW 18.27.090 that contains many exemptions. For example, a contractor's license is NOT required when:

"Any person working on his or her own property, whether occupied by him or her or not, and any person working on his or her personal residence, whether owned by him or her or not but this exemption shall not apply to any person who performs the activities of a contractor on his or her own property for the purpose of selling, demolishing, or leasing the property." RCW 18.27.090(12)

OR

"An owner who performs maintenance, repair, and alteration work in or upon his or her own properties, or who uses his or her own employees to do such work." RCW 18.27.090(13)

But the owner must hold the property for at least 12 month in order to be exempt from licensing under RCW 18.27.090(11).

It is important to understand the scope of applicability of RCW 61.34. Please read carefully the definitions in RCW 61.34.020. This law applies to certain properties only ("distressed homes" that are "in danger of foreclosure") and to certain transactions only ("distressed home conveyance" where a "distressed home owner" continues to occupy the property). Please also read carefully the 82% cap rule in 61.34.120(1)(b), which basically says that a distressed home purchaser should buy from the distressed home owner at least for 82% of FMV of the distressed property. To deal with these issues, we developed contract clauses to be put in agreements. There are also disclosure requirements under this law and under brokerage law RCW 18.85 and RCW 18.86. If these requirements are met, you are good to go. Consult with a qualified attorney before your proceed.