Mastering Negotiating

Perhaps one of the hardest skills to learn is how to successfully negotiate. How to engage meaningfully with another person in a situation where you are trying to get what you want, but make the other person happy as well. Once you get into the investor mindset, it is important to take into account that each party wants to leave feeling they have accomplished their goal. When investing in real estate, this skill is paramount. But how can a person learn this strategy?

In an INC.com Magazine article George Stephanopoulos, anchor of ABC’s Good Morning America and host of This Week,is asked how he gets his interviewees to answer the hard questions. Mr. Stephanopoluos replied with the following advice that applies to negotiating with buyers and sellers as well as to journalists.

1. Prepare extensively. Good preparation leads to better questions. It also demonstrates a genuine interest, Stephanopoulos says. “Knowing what you’re talking about breeds respect on both sides.” Before a 2009 interview about health care with President Barack Obama, Stephanopoulos prepared extensively to show his guest he had deep knowledge of the subject.

. Don’t be a know-it-all. After all that prep work, you might feel like an expert. But keep things simple by starting with direct, open-ended questions. Then, use your knowledge to get your subject to expand on pat answers. “I used to try to show off how much work I did,” Stephanopoulos says. “But sometimes it was all wind-up and no question.”

3. Ask “Why?” Ask “What do you do?” at a cocktail party, and people go on autopilot. Ask “Why?” and people give fresher, more thoughtful answers. The same is true for television interviews, Stephanopoulos says.

4. Watch for facial cues. During a conversation, facial cues can indicate if someone wants to say more or less about a topic. For instance, Stephanopoulos says he can tell someone is having a new thought when his or her eyes light up. “You can see it more than you can hear it,” he says. Then, he guides the conversation in that direction.

5. Force yourself to be interested. If you’re bored by the person sitting across from you, your audience will be, too. The key is to find the one thing that does pique your curiosity. Stephanopoulos interviews a lot of actors, but he doesn’t always like their movies. His solution? He finds one scene that he finds remarkable for some reason and focuses on it.

Source: Inc.com Magazine October 2013 issue.

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Erik Hitzelberger has been Real Estate Investor since 2007. While learning the ropes in the market down-cycle, he now teaches others how to use his systems and leverage other people’s expertise to achieve their own goals.