Tone of Distressed Letters? Cease and Desist?

[David Lamb]

I am very sympathetic to those who are facing foreclosure and other distressed situations.  I try to convey that in my direct marketing materials.  With that said, I just received a call from a lawyer representing a person I sent a mailer giving me "notice" that my letter was causing her "extreme distress" and advising me to "cease and desist" with further marketing otherwise she would go after me for "harassment."  To be sure, I have only sent her 2 letters and made 1 phone call over a 6 week period.  And, I believe that the content is sympathetic but direct, i.e.  "I'm sorry you are going through tough times; I want to work with you to help save your home from foreclosure please call to discuss options."

Sooooo, I guess my question is based on your experience what is the best tone to strike with these letters?  Do I just simply say, "I want to buy your house if interested" and keep it general or make it more personalized, "foreclosures are tough, I would like to help."  Secondly, I know these things are tough hence the call from the lawyer but wtf? Any experience and/or thoughts on the "notice" "cease and desist" "causing extreme distress." Doubtful that this prospect will want to work with me so I wont send her more materials but I was taken aback by the call and "notice."  Opinions?

Thank you all!

Dave

[Kevin Sobilo]

@David Lamb, it sounds like your approach is fine. I would look at the effectiveness of what you do, not the nonsense the oddball responder spews. As long as you are approaching people in a respectful way that you feel good about you can't help how people will respond sometimes.

As an agent, I used to send prospecting letters to FSBOs. I would send a series of 4 mailers giving them free information they might find helpful to sell their home by themselves while setting myself up as someone with expertise who was just a phone call away to help.

One of the letters I sent explained that a common misconception with FSBOs is that they can sell a house "as-is" and not disclose material defects. I explained how that was not true by state law and provided them with a blank seller's disclosure form they could use.

I once got a VERY VERY angry emailed response from someone who accused me of trying to scare people into listing their homes because what I was saying wasn't true. It was a very angry response.

I did respond to that email with the specific section of state law showing the disclosure requirement. They then came to appreciate I wasn't lying and trying to scare anyone and apologized.

You won't probably get any apologies but as long as you know you're on the right side of things doing things the right way. You have nothing to regret. 

[David Lamb]

Yeah, I really appreciate that Kevin.  I'm not sure why I got so peeved but I did.  I really believe in what we do and the services we provide and I have pretty thick skin.  So, his call and my response kind of took me back a bit. After cooling down, I thought about it and decided to share the experience with others so that collectively we are better prepared to address these types of responses and determine how best to respond to them.  Admittedly, I failed on that last part but getting better! :)

[Chris Seveney]

@David Lamb

Two questions -

1. what state is it in?

2. Are you falsely advertising and being predatory as you state “try and help you save their home” - how can you help them save their home, or you trying to get them to sell you the home at below market rate.

[Bob P.]

Quote from @David Lamb:

I am very sympathetic to those who are facing foreclosure and other distressed situations.  I try to convey that in my direct marketing materials.  With that said, I just received a call from a lawyer representing a person I sent a mailer giving me "notice" that my letter was causing her "extreme distress" and advising me to "cease and desist" with further marketing otherwise she would go after me for "harassment."  To be sure, I have only sent her 2 letters and made 1 phone call over a 6 week period.  And, I believe that the content is sympathetic but direct, i.e.  "I'm sorry you are going through tough times; I want to work with you to help save your home from foreclosure please call to discuss options."

Sooooo, I guess my question is based on your experience what is the best tone to strike with these letters?  Do I just simply say, "I want to buy your house if interested" and keep it general or make it more personalized, "foreclosures are tough, I would like to help."  Secondly, I know these things are tough hence the call from the lawyer but wtf? Any experience and/or thoughts on the "notice" "cease and desist" "causing extreme distress." Doubtful that this prospect will want to work with me so I wont send her more materials but I was taken aback by the call and "notice."  Opinions?

Thank you all!

Dave

It's important to understand that not everybody wants your help or being reminded of their circumstances. It is not a big deal.

Simply stop mailing or contacting the person and life goes on.

If I had to contact every ad sender I get in the mail to tell them to stop, first of all it wouldn't change a thing and secondly it would drive me crazy.

She is just feeling overwhelmed because, believe it or not, you are not the only person mailing to her. ;-)

I leave with the shoebox of letters they get, when I buy a foreclosure. It's pretty amazing the volume.

The phrase "I want to work with you to help save your home from foreclosure" can get you into a lot of trouble in some states unless you are an attorney.

[Joe S.]

Quote from @David Lamb:

I am very sympathetic to those who are facing foreclosure and other distressed situations.  I try to convey that in my direct marketing materials.  With that said, I just received a call from a lawyer representing a person I sent a mailer giving me "notice" that my letter was causing her "extreme distress" and advising me to "cease and desist" with further marketing otherwise she would go after me for "harassment."  To be sure, I have only sent her 2 letters and made 1 phone call over a 6 week period.  And, I believe that the content is sympathetic but direct, i.e.  "I'm sorry you are going through tough times; I want to work with you to help save your home from foreclosure please call to discuss options."

Sooooo, I guess my question is based on your experience what is the best tone to strike with these letters?  Do I just simply say, "I want to buy your house if interested" and keep it general or make it more personalized, "foreclosures are tough, I would like to help."  Secondly, I know these things are tough hence the call from the lawyer but wtf? Any experience and/or thoughts on the "notice" "cease and desist" "causing extreme distress." Doubtful that this prospect will want to work with me so I wont send her more materials but I was taken aback by the call and "notice."  Opinions?

Thank you all!

Dave

For starters some people are angry that you know that they’re behind in house payments and facing foreclosure. So the fact that you are telling them that you know they’re in foreclosure is like telling a drunk you know they’re drunk. If you’ve never told a drunk, they’re drunk, then you probably wouldn’t understand what I’m saying. 

[David Lamb]

Quote from @Joe S.:

Quote from @David Lamb:

I am very sympathetic to those who are facing foreclosure and other distressed situations.  I try to convey that in my direct marketing materials.  With that said, I just received a call from a lawyer representing a person I sent a mailer giving me "notice" that my letter was causing her "extreme distress" and advising me to "cease and desist" with further marketing otherwise she would go after me for "harassment."  To be sure, I have only sent her 2 letters and made 1 phone call over a 6 week period.  And, I believe that the content is sympathetic but direct, i.e.  "I'm sorry you are going through tough times; I want to work with you to help save your home from foreclosure please call to discuss options."

Sooooo, I guess my question is based on your experience what is the best tone to strike with these letters?  Do I just simply say, "I want to buy your house if interested" and keep it general or make it more personalized, "foreclosures are tough, I would like to help."  Secondly, I know these things are tough hence the call from the lawyer but wtf? Any experience and/or thoughts on the "notice" "cease and desist" "causing extreme distress." Doubtful that this prospect will want to work with me so I wont send her more materials but I was taken aback by the call and "notice."  Opinions?

Thank you all!

Dave

For starters some people are angry that you know that they’re behind in house payments and facing foreclosure. So the fact that you are telling them that you know they’re in foreclosure is like telling a drunk you know they’re drunk. If you’ve never told a drunk, they’re drunk, then you probably wouldn’t understand what I’m saying. 

 Haha.  Yes, I have and well said.

[Joe S.]

Quote from @David Lamb:

Quote from @Joe S.:

Quote from @David Lamb:

I am very sympathetic to those who are facing foreclosure and other distressed situations.  I try to convey that in my direct marketing materials.  With that said, I just received a call from a lawyer representing a person I sent a mailer giving me "notice" that my letter was causing her "extreme distress" and advising me to "cease and desist" with further marketing otherwise she would go after me for "harassment."  To be sure, I have only sent her 2 letters and made 1 phone call over a 6 week period.  And, I believe that the content is sympathetic but direct, i.e.  "I'm sorry you are going through tough times; I want to work with you to help save your home from foreclosure please call to discuss options."

Sooooo, I guess my question is based on your experience what is the best tone to strike with these letters?  Do I just simply say, "I want to buy your house if interested" and keep it general or make it more personalized, "foreclosures are tough, I would like to help."  Secondly, I know these things are tough hence the call from the lawyer but wtf? Any experience and/or thoughts on the "notice" "cease and desist" "causing extreme distress." Doubtful that this prospect will want to work with me so I wont send her more materials but I was taken aback by the call and "notice."  Opinions?

Thank you all!

Dave

For starters some people are angry that you know that they’re behind in house payments and facing foreclosure. So the fact that you are telling them that you know they’re in foreclosure is like telling a drunk you know they’re drunk. If you’ve never told a drunk, they’re drunk, then you probably wouldn’t understand what I’m saying. 

 Haha.  Yes, I have and well said.

 Maybe my analogy was too restricted for all viewers, so try this one… Have you ever tried Telling a fat person that they are fat?

How did that one turn out?

[Jay Hinrichs]

Quote from @Joe S.:

Quote from @David Lamb:

Quote from @Joe S.:

Quote from @David Lamb:

I am very sympathetic to those who are facing foreclosure and other distressed situations.  I try to convey that in my direct marketing materials.  With that said, I just received a call from a lawyer representing a person I sent a mailer giving me "notice" that my letter was causing her "extreme distress" and advising me to "cease and desist" with further marketing otherwise she would go after me for "harassment."  To be sure, I have only sent her 2 letters and made 1 phone call over a 6 week period.  And, I believe that the content is sympathetic but direct, i.e.  "I'm sorry you are going through tough times; I want to work with you to help save your home from foreclosure please call to discuss options."

Sooooo, I guess my question is based on your experience what is the best tone to strike with these letters?  Do I just simply say, "I want to buy your house if interested" and keep it general or make it more personalized, "foreclosures are tough, I would like to help."  Secondly, I know these things are tough hence the call from the lawyer but wtf? Any experience and/or thoughts on the "notice" "cease and desist" "causing extreme distress." Doubtful that this prospect will want to work with me so I wont send her more materials but I was taken aback by the call and "notice."  Opinions?

Thank you all!

Dave

For starters some people are angry that you know that they’re behind in house payments and facing foreclosure. So the fact that you are telling them that you know they’re in foreclosure is like telling a drunk you know they’re drunk. If you’ve never told a drunk, they’re drunk, then you probably wouldn’t understand what I’m saying. 

 Haha.  Yes, I have and well said.

 Maybe my analogy was too restricted for all viewers, so try this one… Have you ever tried Telling a fat person that they are fat?

How did that one turn out?

Also not all spouses tell the other whats up and the letters set off world war 3.

AS an active courthouse step buyer.. I would often find the letters sent to these folks stacked up and left on the counters..  I would say someone in our market that has gone into foreclosure will receive no less than 200 direct mail peices.. from RE brokers Lenders and foreclosure buyers Most foreclosure buyers have a canned pitch.. that goes something Like this..  "I too was in foreclosure years ago so I know what your going through"  that is a very common so when folks losing the home see the same pitch multiple times they know its just BS.  Then you have the letters that get very religious trying to appeal to the Christian side of things.. Etc etc.  We door knocked and did not send letters  .. as we found it much more effective belly to belly.

AS for lawyer contacting you unless they are going to do it on a retainer I cant see someone who is in default paying for this.

[Andy Sabisch]

As others have said, are you looking to buy the property at below market pricing or are you looking at helping them stave off foreclosure. If the later, be interested in what tools and resources you have to do that. It seems a more truthful approach is to help them sell their property and avoid the credit hit a foreclosure will produce since you are trying to buy the property (to flip or rent) rather than help them stay in their home.

[David Lamb]

Quote from @Andy Sabisch:

As others have said, are you looking to buy the property at below market pricing or are you looking at helping them stave off foreclosure. If the later, be interested in what tools and resources you have to do that. It seems a more truthful approach is to help them sell their property and avoid the credit hit a foreclosure will produce since you are trying to buy the property (to flip or rent) rather than help them stay in their home.

Yes, that is correct.  Maybe I need to adjust the messaging because I am trying to buy the house.  Great idea, thank you Andy!

[Jay Hinrichs]

Quote from @Andy Sabisch:

As others have said, are you looking to buy the property at below market pricing or are you looking at helping them stave off foreclosure. If the later, be interested in what tools and resources you have to do that. It seems a more truthful approach is to help them sell their property and avoid the credit hit a foreclosure will produce since you are trying to buy the property (to flip or rent) rather than help them stay in their home.

 In most states if your trying to help them stay in the house and are charging them a fee to help them then you need to be a licensed foreclosure consultant.  Most of the " we will help you stay in your home companies" got put out of bizz during the GFC since so many were just fraudsters .

If someone is in foreclosure their credit is ruined at that point going to foreclosure sale does not matter on their credit enough to make that a  motivating factor although folks BS about that too.

[Eric James]

Tell her to register her name on the "do not mail list".  lol

[V.G Jason]

Quote from @Joe S.:

Quote from @David Lamb:

Quote from @Joe S.:

Quote from @David Lamb:

I am very sympathetic to those who are facing foreclosure and other distressed situations.  I try to convey that in my direct marketing materials.  With that said, I just received a call from a lawyer representing a person I sent a mailer giving me "notice" that my letter was causing her "extreme distress" and advising me to "cease and desist" with further marketing otherwise she would go after me for "harassment."  To be sure, I have only sent her 2 letters and made 1 phone call over a 6 week period.  And, I believe that the content is sympathetic but direct, i.e.  "I'm sorry you are going through tough times; I want to work with you to help save your home from foreclosure please call to discuss options."

Sooooo, I guess my question is based on your experience what is the best tone to strike with these letters?  Do I just simply say, "I want to buy your house if interested" and keep it general or make it more personalized, "foreclosures are tough, I would like to help."  Secondly, I know these things are tough hence the call from the lawyer but wtf? Any experience and/or thoughts on the "notice" "cease and desist" "causing extreme distress." Doubtful that this prospect will want to work with me so I wont send her more materials but I was taken aback by the call and "notice."  Opinions?

Thank you all!

Dave

For starters some people are angry that you know that they’re behind in house payments and facing foreclosure. So the fact that you are telling them that you know they’re in foreclosure is like telling a drunk you know they’re drunk. If you’ve never told a drunk, they’re drunk, then you probably wouldn’t understand what I’m saying. 

 Haha.  Yes, I have and well said.

 Maybe my analogy was too restricted for all viewers, so try this one… Have you ever tried Telling a fat person that they are fat?

How did that one turn out?

 I'm not fat, just big boned.

I would just respect the lawyer's ask, and cease talking to them. You tried your shot, why waste more energy and time in this? The approach is fine, some will just respond this way. Keep it moving. 

[Andy Sabisch]

There is a difference in the hit someone's credit takes if they are behind in payments or they are in foreclosure so offering to buy the property before it goes into foreclosure does help the owner to some degree and it is not claiming to help them stay in the house.  I have seen some people tell the owners that they can rent it after they sell it but if they did not make payments to own it why would they pay rent and you will simply be heading to court to evict them.  Use the right words so you are not tricking them into discussing a deal that you can't make happen (stay in their home).

[Bob P.]

Quote from @David Lamb:

I am very sympathetic to those who are facing foreclosure and other distressed situations.  I try to convey that in my direct marketing materials.  With that said, I just received a call from a lawyer representing a person I sent a mailer giving me "notice" that my letter was causing her "extreme distress" and advising me to "cease and desist" with further marketing otherwise she would go after me for "harassment."  To be sure, I have only sent her 2 letters and made 1 phone call over a 6 week period.  And, I believe that the content is sympathetic but direct, i.e.  "I'm sorry you are going through tough times; I want to work with you to help save your home from foreclosure please call to discuss options."

Sooooo, I guess my question is based on your experience what is the best tone to strike with these letters?  Do I just simply say, "I want to buy your house if interested" and keep it general or make it more personalized, "foreclosures are tough, I would like to help."  Secondly, I know these things are tough hence the call from the lawyer but wtf? Any experience and/or thoughts on the "notice" "cease and desist" "causing extreme distress." Doubtful that this prospect will want to work with me so I wont send her more materials but I was taken aback by the call and "notice."  Opinions?

Thank you all!

Dave

From a credit damage perspective, once they have missed a payment (31 days late), it shows up on their record and after the 3rd missed payment their credit is shot. A foreclosure shows up once the notice of foreclosure has been recorded, so their credit shows a foreclosure when the paperwork is filed (that's when you learn about it) the damage is already done by then. Anything you do can not undo the damage. The credit has to be rebuilt and there are special ways to do that, which make it go faster for the borrower.

[Jay Hinrichs]

Quote from @Andy Sabisch:
There is a difference in the hit someone's credit takes if they are behind in payments or they are in foreclosure so offering to buy the property before it goes into foreclosure does help the owner to some degree and it is not claiming to help them stay in the house.  I have seen some people tell the owners that they can rent it after they sell it but if they did not make payments to own it why would they pay rent and you will simply be heading to court to evict them.  Use the right words so you are not tricking them into discussing a deal that you can't make happen (stay in their home).

see below on the credit .. once you have 90 days  late your toast.