Tenant Applicants say the dumbest things

[Robin Grimes]

Stupid things Tenant Applicant’s say.

I had renovated a nice 4/3/2 and put it on the market for lease. Here are some of the comments from people who toured the property during the open house or called me from signage.

#1
Young single mother with 3yr old in tow. “My boyfriend will be paying the rent, he said to just go find a place, but I want to rent it in my name, so it will be mine alone.”
I’m thinking: I’m not renting to someone without the verified income to pay the rent. Sorry but a promise from a boyfriend just won’t do.
I’m saying: Here’s a rental application. The application fee is $25 but you should know that I will need to verify income and whoever is paying will need to be on the application and lease.

#2
Middle aged couple with no kids. Wife says “I don’t like the wood floors. If you can put down carpet and repaint to something brighter, we’d be interested. Also you will need to replace the stove.”
I’m thinking: The wood floors are new laminate that I just spent $1400 and two days installing. The paint is all new also. If you want to remodel a house, go buy one yourself.
I’m saying: Here’s a rental application. The application fee is $25. The property is being rented in its newly remodeled condition.

#3
Family. Made appointment and met me at house. Husband says “I need a 3 car garage.”
I’m thinking: The 2 in 4/3/2 stands for TWO car garage. Plus the photos show it’s a two car garage, so why are you here wasting my time and yours? Did you think I was hiding a third garage bay in the back yard?
I’m saying: Here’s a rental application. The application fee is $25. This house only has a two car garage.

#4
Very young guy, young 20’s maybe, called me from sign in yard. He’s parked at house. Says: “ I need a big place for my girlfriend and our 3 month old since we want to have more kids. Could you help me out and rent it to me for $xxx” (about ½ the rental rate).
I’m thinking: So you’re requesting that I contribute half your rent so you can have more kids that you can’t house and support.
I’m saying: I’m happy to provide an application. The application fee is $25. Sorry the rental rate is firm.
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