How Do You Not Let Your Expenses Grow With Your Income?

[Dominik Perrenoud]

Hello financially intelligent people

How do you not let your expenses grow with your income? This question has been on my mind lately due to significant changes in my financial situation (for the better, luckily).

Let me quickly give you a bit of my background. I read "Rich Dad Poor Dad" by Robert Kiyosaki in 2015. Since then, I've been hooked on everything finance, investment and mindset related. I've read books, listened to podcasts and read many blog articles on BiggerPockets, of course. 

So I thought my money mindset was on point, particularly when it comes to spend less than you make. Until about a year ago, I was living on a student's "income" that more or less covered basic spending and nothing more, which was fine for me and even allowed me to put a bit of it on the side over the years...

...which I then spent on my first car as soon as I got my first real job. And this is where it gets tricky for me. After more than doubling my income in said job over the last year (having started as an intern), I repeatedly find myself looking for loft apartments twice the rent of my current place (where I actually like living), unnecessary modifications for my car and the like. 

I always thought I was above that kind of thinking (aka expanding your spending with your income) because I managed to get by on a much smaller income. Now I'm realizing I'm very much like everyone else in this regard - what a horrifying thought.

Recently, I read "Your Money or Your Life" and very much liked the concept of "enough" in it. Basically, that's the point where more stuff doesn't add anything of value to your life. Also, I started reading a little bit about Buddhism - okay, it's The Dalai Lama's Cat... Given that the author knows what he is writing about, a core learning in Buddhism seems to be that true happiness comes from the inside, not our circumstances. Also a concept which I very much endorse. 

So why the hell can't I stop thinking about that $3000 carbon rear wing for my car?

My guess is that my subconscious tells me that now, finally - with my first actual income after 25 years of, well, basically minimum wage, starting at birth - I deserve to get all the nice things. So by denying them to me, I am cheating myself out of what I have been waiting for for the last 15 years or so. In any case, I find it really hard to struggle against it, even though I firmly believe the right mindset switch is up there in that bald bubble above my eyes.

Now - if you have borne with me until here, let me ask you: How have you managed to not let your expenses grow in step with your income?

What has helped you get your mindset in order so as not to feel you're depriving yourself of anything while your income is growing?