Deadbeat Dad Squatting in House For Free, But is on the Deed

[William Coet]

A family member is on the deed to the house with her husband.  They have two young kids together.  He doesn't have a job and has been abusive.  She has a full time job and pays nearly all household expenses including all childcare costs and the home mortgage, taxes, etc.  She has left the house and moved in with a family member along with the two kids because of the abusive behavior.  She is continuing to pay the costs for the house.
In the meantime the deadbeat Dad is statying at the house and refusing to leave unless she pays him for half of the equity in the house.  He is leveraging the fact that he is on the deed.
Any ideas on how to get him out of the house and ideally off of the deed would be appreciated.
Thank you.

[Theresa Harris]

She needs to talk to a lawyer.

[Mary M.]

I am sure there are various organizations to help women in abusive relationships. If she does not have $$ for attorney then have her contact them and they may be able to offer assistence.  

I did a quick google search and found this. May not be in her area, but just search “womens services” https://www.womenshelpcenter.o...

[Kyle J.]

Well if he’s on the deed, he’s not “squatting” in the house, he’s a legal owner of the house with as much right to it as her absent some court order to the contrary.

Having said that, if he was physically abusive to her, perhaps she could seek a restraining order (or order of protection as they’re called in some jurisdictions) which often include a move-out order when two people live together, as well a requirement to stay a certain distance away from the protected party. 

Ultimately though, it sounds like the long-term solution is that they’ll need to file for divorce and have a court weigh-in on a division of their marital assets if they can’t come to an agreement. 

[Brent Paul]

If he's on the deed then there isn't much you can do.  Your best best bet is to talk to a lawyer and figure out what the next steps will be.  A Restraining order and a divorce are probably in her future.  With her paying all the bills and him being abusive she has a pretty strong case against him.  I hope she stays far away from him.  I don't wish that on anyone.  Breaks my heart to hear things like this.

[Jennifer Gligoric]

She immediately needs a lawyer   Her leaving the marital property will be seen as an issue if she does not have police reports that support the abuse.  She needs to immediately ask a lawyer about getting a temporary restraining order in place that forces the abusive spouse to leave for the safety of the children & her.  This is not legal advice; just common sense but she has to do this now.  The longer she lets the husband stay in the home the more it goes against her - even if she's paying. Depending on how long they were married and how long he was out of a job, he might ask for spousal support & maintenance - her waiting & not being as aggressive as possible only makes his case seem like he's the injured party which is the hallmark of abusers.  They spend lifetimes learning how to beat down everyone around them weaving their tales of being the victims & using the system as a battering ram against their own victims.  I will pray for her & those poor kids.

[Jennifer Gligoric]

I just got off a podcast with Denise Shroder, she's a Realtor in Oklahoma & she's a RCS-D™ | Real Estate Collaboration Specialist - Divorce™ specialist. She also added (because after the show when she mentioned this it brought up this question) that 

1) She needs a lawyer and try and find one that has experience with mental health/addiction issues because that can help your family member and 

2) Get a Realtor who has the Divorce specialist certification designation because high-conflict buy/sales need specialist experience and can really help your family member with things a regular Realtor might overlook.   

I didn't even realize this was a specialty until Denise brought it up today.   She also highly recommended the book by Laurel Starks "The House Matters in Divorce: Untangling the Legal, Financial & Emotional Ties Before You Sign On the Dotted Line".   

By the way, if she wants to reach out to her - she's been on Oprah, HGTV 3 times and is really an amazing woman or just read her credentials - her & her husband can best be found on Facebook (@tdshroder).