Soon-to-be wife not on board

[D'Andre Byers]

I've searched around the forums looking for someone in a similar situation but it seems like not many are where I'm at.

I'm 21 years old and just recently got engaged. I don't yet have any investment properties. I know the saying "happy wife, happy life" and I don't want to start our future together on a bad note. She is very adamant on buying a nice pristine house (small starter houses) that range anywhere from $100,000-$200,000. I'm listening to as many podcast episodes here on BP as I can to try and find new ways to invest and also give her what she wants but she won't budge.  I've mentioned live-in flips, house hacking, and just plain old rentals. But it seems that every "solution" that I offer is combatted with another reason that we shouldn't.

She's saying that we are too young (she is 21 as well) and although I know that REI takes time, what better time than when we're both young to formulate a plan, and put it into action? Soon (but not too soon) kids will be thrown into the mix and I fear that they will just be an excuse to put off investing further and further until I get stuck in a situation where investing just won't be feasible.

I just spent my down payment for a house on a ring and now we are planning a wedding so I have time to work her into the idea of investing. This also gives me time to learn more and more about investing before starting out. I'm keeping my mind open to the fact that it may be some time before we are able to save enough to get into our first property. But I want to get her on board with investing before the time comes where we are searching for a house.

Anyone have any advice on ways to go about talking to her? ANYTHING helps.

Thank you for taking time to look over my post,

D'Andre

[Jim K.]

Originally posted by @D'Andre Byers:

I've searched around the forums looking for someone in a similar situation but it seems like not many are where I'm at.

I'm 21 years old and just recently got engaged. I don't yet have any investment properties. I know the saying "happy wife, happy life" and I don't want to start our future together on a bad note. She is very adamant on buying a nice pristine house (small starter houses) that range anywhere from $100,000-$200,000. I'm listening to as many podcast episodes here on BP as I can to try and find new ways to invest and also give her what she wants but she won't budge.  I've mentioned live-in flips, house hacking, and just plain old rentals. But it seems that every "solution" that I offer is combatted with another reason that we shouldn't.

She's saying that we are too young (she is 21 as well) and although I know that REI takes time, what better time than when we're both young to formulate a plan, and put it into action? Soon (but not too soon) kids will be thrown into the mix and I fear that they will just be an excuse to put off investing further and further until I get stuck in a situation where investing just won't be feasible.

I just spent my down payment for a house on a ring and now we are planning a wedding so I have time to work her into the idea of investing. This also gives me time to learn more and more about investing before starting out. I'm keeping my mind open to the fact that it may be some time before we are able to save enough to get into our first property. But I want to get her on board with investing before the time comes where we are searching for a house.

Anyone have any advice on ways to go about talking to her? ANYTHING helps.

Thank you for taking time to look over my post,

D'Andre

D'Andre, here's something I always ask about situations like these:

Have you asked her what HER strategy for the financial health of your family entails? Does she have a plan? Is her plan to live in a nice starter home that keeps up with the Joneses and drive nice new starter cars that keep with the Joneses and have expenses that keep up with the Joneses as you both strive and strive to provide more income to keep up with the Joneses...and that you do these things as you expand the Byers family, member by member, and grow the Byers budget, lifestyle-creep-expense by lifestyle-creep-expense?

Because if that's what she wants out of life, I can give you the names of a dozen broke-a$$ simps in their forties with wives just like that.