Spouses going it alone or together?

Question

I have greatly enjoyed my time so far here on Bigger Pockets.  I tend to be the one who is willing to read real estate books and listen to podcasts.  I love learning.  I'm a nerd that way.  My wife loves the idea of investing and being included in discussions but prefers not to read non-fiction books or "be bothered with the details".  My concern is that, in the event of my death, she is able to maintain control over our assets and doesn't get taken advantage of.  I want her to never *have to* get a job to support herself and our children.  That is a huge reason that I am investing in Multi-family rentals.

My question is, should she and I have separate BP accounts so she can hopefully learn on her own while investigating the site and networking with others or does anyone on here suggest that we have a shared account?  Personally, I refuse to have a shared Facebook account because I think we need some individualism when it comes to friends and socializing, and I don't care to talk too much with the friend on Facebook when I can't tell who it is with whom I am talking, so I figure others may feel the same way.  Any thoughts on what we should do?

Lynne M. · Answer

I would definitely have her set up her own BP account.  Both my husband and I have full time jobs (for now) and both are interested in different aspects of real estate investing.  We have separate BP accounts.  What you may find interesting, she may not, but she may enjoy being able to read about all of the "newbies" and that may spark her interest on some aspect of real estate that may not have occurred to you.   It may also make her feel welcome to know that she is not alone in being new to all of this.

Antonio Coleman · Answer

Welcome @Daniel Mohnkern  to BP you're in the right place!

Daniel Mohnkern · Answer

Great advice.  Thank you all for such quick responses.

I do have more than 10 times income in Term Life Ins, so we are set there.  And we have been through FPU and are nearly debt free personally.  I agree with Dave Ramsey on the personal finances side of things and I lean towards mixing his strategy and Robert Kiyosaki's strategies when it comes to investment properties.  I would have to save all my life to buy one investment if I paid cash for my beginning deals.  Because of leverage, I bought my home for nothing down and my first investment property for only 10% down.  I agree that it would be wise to phase out of leverage as the ability presents itself and yet I like the prospect of using my equity to buy more while I'm young.

I suppose I may have been a little anal about insisting that she learn everything.  There are management companies after all.  I'll have to lighten up and stop insisting that she learn everything I have learned.  And, you can rest assured, when you speak to me, you are actually speaking to me.

Thanks again for the advice.

Jennifer Lee · Answer

REI is my thing, although my partner in crime is my husband.

I do all the learning and he keeps me on track. Like my boss. He is my silent partner or money.

I just asked him: he doesnt know a whole lot about RE. Although we have been doing this for 12 yrs. But he trust me and my judgment.

He is involved in all my deals. Macro manage.

He helps me analyze deal ( his favorite thing to do)

He said he knows his limitations. And I have my limitations.

I dont nego, and he loves to nego!!

I love finding and doing, he couldn't careless. Just Get it done!

Like marriage you play off each others strength and weaknesses.

Find what works one deal at a time

John Myers · Answer

You have a great question and has made me think of my situation.  We own 8 rental homes and my wife could not find the homes if she had too.  I need to get her up to speed on what is going on with our investment properties.

Clay Smith · Answer

Make sure you have a will.  Tell your attorney what you want to happen in the event you pass.  Pay down properties and do not continue to leverage your whole life.  Follow a plan like Dave Ramsey lays out.  Most important, BUY term life insurance to offset the risk.

Jennifer B. · Answer

Hi Daniel,

Separate accounts.  And get a good life insurance policy.  Then by all means teach her the ropes of how you are handling your real estate investments.  It certainly wouldn't hurt to discuss Plan B if you should perish -sell, she manages, or turn over to management company.

I have managed our rentals for over a decade (I'm also a realtor).  My hubby knows basically what I do, but if I were to pass, he'd most likely just sell all our properties because he'd be busy with 3 kids and also have plenty of $$ from my life insurance.  Just my thoughts.

Jeff Rabinowitz · Answer

@Daniel Mohnkern, welcome to BP. The point you make about facebook is relevant here. When you become active you will make relationships with other members. We will get to know your interests and expertise. Do you want to have to identify yourself (or have your wife identify herself) every time you post? Do you want everyone to guess? As you know, some will and some won't bother. So, am I speaking with you or your wife right now?