Getting confidence back after mental breakdown

[Leslie A.]

I'm probably the only person on here that has gone through this, but I don't know of another forum where I can discuss this. 

I rent out RVs that people live in. I've been doing it for over 3 years. 

So, eleven months after I started, we had 9 RVs.  I was in partnership with my sister. 

One night I literally went crazy. I went manic for the first time in my life. Way later I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. But I didn' know anything was wrong with me. 

I began giving away money, making bad decisions, having very grandiose thoughts, I walked out on my family  (I had been married 27 years and had 10 and 11 year old kids), etc.

Anyway, long story short, that episode lasted 3 months, then after a time I had another episode.

When all was said and done I had been arrested 7 times, hospitalized 5 times, dissolved my partnership with my sister, and 3 of my 5 RVs were sold. 

I currently have 2 left. They are doing pretty well. And I am about ready to get into investing mode again. This time, and this is something I've planned since before I got sick, I'm going to do rooming houses.

My problem is that I'm having a very hard time with confidence. I used to know that I was a very intelligent and competent person. But you cant imagine what it does to your self esteem to find out you have mental problems.  However, I have been well for 18 months now. For that I am so grateful. But I fear I could get sick again (but I take my meds religiously).  

I think this post is rambling.  If you can relate or have advice for me, I'd appreciate it.