Updated almost 11 years ago on . Most recent reply
Vulnerability, real estate investing, and letting go of your ego
For the longest time I had a hard time calling myself a real estate investor. I felt like an impostor and was worried about coming off as an amateur. The jargon was new, the amount of money seemed staggering, and the only things I had to really cling on to were the BiggerPockets podcasts. I was afraid of appearing incompetent. Maybe it was a deep-rooted fear of failure. Maybe it was pure ego.
Like it or not I was as green as they come. Sure I had read the books, listened to all the podcasts, and was familiar with the jargon. And that helps to an extent, but I still needed people to think I was the real deal. My wife / business partner on the other hand could not be more different. She likes to wear her emotions on her sleeve and is one of those people that have never met a stranger. I am often bewildered how she does it. One second she’s alone, and the next she and a stranger are talking like they’ve known each other for years.
In the beginning of our investing careers I was mortified when she would tell sellers, much less other investors, that we had never done a deal. But something strange would happen that could best be described as a genuine exchange. People responded to her honesty, her openness, and her vulnerably. I’ve since made a conscious decision to let go of my ego, live in my truth, and learn how to become more vulnerable.
The results have been fantastic. My network has grown tenfold as well as my career. I still consider myself a new investor, but now I’m much more comfortable accepting that l do not know it all, and I don’t need people to think that I do. I have come to rely on and cherish the advice and council from more experienced investors that I can now feel comfortable calling with questions about my deals. Those relationships never would have happened if I kept myself shut off, imprisoned by my ego.
If I can give any advice to those just getting started out in their investing career it’s that it’s okay not to know it all. You don’t have to put on a show. Be open, be honest, and most of all, be genuine. You won’t be sorry.
Most Popular Reply
I think that many of us consider ourselves "new investors" to a degree even after we have a few deals under our belts. There is always so much more to learn, which I believe is evidently true as you listen to the podcasts. There are so many niche areas of real estate investing that the most important is to pick yours and be good at it.
Good for you for overcoming what causes so many to fail....they never try. They read, they listen, but ultimately they analyze until they are paralyzed, afraid to finally dip their toe in the water and do a deal. We were all in the same position where we were just doing our first deal at one point in time. Every experience is a new opportunity to learn, whether it is a failure or a success. Embrace all of those opportunities because they shape who and what you become.